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Newest Member: LoveBetrayed (45355)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long 7 Months
EMO579
♀ New Member
Member # 42190
Stop  Posted: 1:58 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just a little Thursday afternoon vent....

Sometimes it's just tough. I know, I know no one said it was going to be easy. And, I know, I know I was the one that created this unnecessary mess in our lives.

It's tough sometimes just even looking at him. Knowing that I'M THE ONE THAT CAUSED HIM TO HURT.

Sometimes he asks me or assumes that for me, as the WS, that I don't think about it or I've already moved on. It's the complete opposite.

I'm not happy with myself and nor am I happy with my actions. I'm actually quite disgusted with myself. I can't take anything back. The only thing I can do is to continue to live my live the best possible way and to prove to him and our marriage that I'm in this 100%.

We've come a long way in 7 months, it hasn't been easy...


Posts: 3 | Registered: Jan 2014
Wayflost
♀ Member
Member # 41583
Default  Posted: 2:16 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((EMO579))

You've been heard.


Me: WW
Him: BH (totalheartbreak)
Both: 30s

Posts: 420 | Registered: Dec 2013
DrJekyll
♂ Member
Member # 43618
Default  Posted: 2:40 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I understand those feelings. at 6.5 months myself. and this is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. keep fighting. you can do this.

I don't know if you have felt the same, but it seems like right about 6 months there was a shift in me. As the immediate crisis had ended, and the reality really had started setting in. Maybe it is that by this time frame we have peeled back so many layers of broken, the the rottenness inside us is exposed to the air. and man does it stink. Makes me want to vomit far too often.


I am no longer Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. I am me, and they are both part of me.

"If you don't eat the elephant in one bite, it might trample you while chewing"

ME: WH HER: BS (holesinmybucket)

no stop sign = BS always welcome
I d


Posts: 705 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: United States
EMO579
♀ New Member
Member # 42190
Default  Posted: 3:20 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you both. I guess I'm just having a bad day...

Posts: 3 | Registered: Jan 2014
WalkinOnEggshelz
♀ Member
Member # 29447
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sometimes he asks me or assumes that for me, as the WS, that I don't think about it or I've already moved on. It's the complete opposite.

What reason would he have to assume this? Do you share your thoughts about the A and how you feel about what you have done with him? Do you initiate conversations about your A with him or do you wait until he brings it up?

You may be thinking about it 24/7, but if you aren't sharing bit with him, he will have to assume you aren't thinking about it all but rather rug sweeping. He needs to know that he isn't in this alone. He needs to know that you the two of you are on the same page in regards to your A, your well being, and your M.

Don't be afraid to get vulnerable with him. He will be more willing to be vulnerable with you. But you need to be able to carry that heavy load.


Me: WS 42
Him: BH 43(HoldingTogether)
M: 18years, together 22
2 Daughters: 13 and 10
D Day: 7/24/2010; TT to 10/17/10
If you keep asking people to give you the benefit of the doubt, they will eventually start to doubt your benefit.

Posts: 736 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Texas
NoGoodUsername
♂ Member
Member # 40181
Default  Posted: 8:24 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry that you are having a rough day. I understand your feelings and you aren't alone.

Better days are possible, hang in there and keep swinging.


Me: WH
Her: BW
Dday 7/11/13
"May you be protected from hearts that are not humble, tongues that are not wise and eyes that have forgotten how to cry."

Posts: 252 | Registered: Aug 2013
Topic Posts: 6

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