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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Betrayed Men Part 20
HoldingTogether
♂ Member
Member # 29429
Default  Posted: 10:49 AM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Tred, no hangover ? Really ? What your secret ?

Don't sober up . To be honest, not really sure. I just don't get them. I'd probably drink less if there were actual consequences like hangovers


I would be tempted to say that you must have never been drunk enough, but then again, I was with you at the Houston GTG. LOL


Me:BH 41
Her:FWW40(Walkinoneggshellz)
2 Beautiful little girls 13&10
Dday: 7/24/10 1yr EA turned 5 monthPA
"I gotta hole in me now... I got a scar I can talk about."

Posts: 407 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: New Life
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 11:42 AM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actually, I have heard over the years that it is not uncommon - maybe a DNA thing - my dad said that he never had hangovers either.

(no-hangovers probably make regular appearances at AA)

God Bless You william! Your type of fortitude is something I do not possess.


Posts: 6617 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
SWAT70
♂ Member
Member # 42915
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Surprisingly the hangover wasn't so bad this morning. Got up early and went for a run to clear me head. I called WW very early this morning to make sure she and the lids were alright. It was an akward conversation and I hate that.

Ended up at the in laws and had breakfast with the kids. I took the wife to the station because OM got arrested around 5:20 this morning. DWI and the PO violation. She sure can pick em.

The wife had to sign another PO request for court. The wife and I then went to the DA's offices to talk with the assistant DA who will be prosecuting OM. The same shit who told me OM deserved a plea bargain. Egg on the face to say the least. So I asked what was they plan now. OM has the original harassment charge, three PO violation charges, endangering, another harassment, DWI and disorderly conduct. Six misdemeanors and one violation.(petty offense) DA plans to offer another plea bargain. Plead guilty to one PO violation and the DWI to be served concurrent. The other charges would be dismissed. Maximum of one year in county jail and the PO would be in place for 10 years. Any other arrests for violation of PO or DWI will be felonies. My wife was visibly upset over the process since she has never actually had any work interaction with prosecutors. But she was strong and recounted everything that had happened. OM lawyer has already filed his motions and requests and agreed to the plea bargain pending OM agreeing. When we left my wife said something. It was something like I'm sorry for what I have done and what I brought into your life. I understand that this is very painful for you and is there anything I can do to help.

I'll admit I was upset over the whole process as well and when she was talking I was kind of in a fog so I wasn't paying attention at first. For the first time since I suspected she was cheating. I saw my wife again. The beatiful and kind hearted woman I fell in love with.

I'm not sure whether OM will actually take the plea or not. I'm thinking he will since there is very strong cases against him for all of the PO violations two of which were direct knowledge by officers and his tirade in the park had tons of independent witnesses.

I also would like to take the time to say goodbye to another fallen police officer. This one is from Binghamton,NY which sadly is very nearby the municipality the just had the LODD. Officer Katie Brown and her fiance a former police officer and military veteran were killed in a MVA two nights ago. While I didn't know her she will be missed. RIP officer Brown.


Me BH-45. WW-39
DD-11 DS-6 DS-3
D day was Valentines day 2014. Talk about a trigger.


Posts: 335 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: Down range
Schadenfreude
♂ Member
Member # 43075
Default  Posted: 2:23 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sounds like a really good deal from his viewpoint. And if the prosecutor is serious about "felony" next time, its a decent deal for WW. Maybe, just maybe, he'll realize that days behind bars in the local lock up are way easier than months or years behind bars in the state prison. So, maybe her troubles with OM are over. Maybe.

Doesn't the local judge get pissed when HIS order is violated? Most do, in my experience.

Did you, before all this came down, realize what a total self-destructive ass OM was? Or has he just gone nuts recently?

BTW, you know what suicide by cop is. And I'm sure he does. Make sure he can't set you up as he sounds crazy enough to think a 40 cal shower from you on him would bring you down, too.


Posts: 892 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: Midwest
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 2:34 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Maybe, just maybe, he'll realize that days behind bars in the local lock up are way easier than months or years behind bars in the state prison

If he has any sense, he'll take that deal. He'd be a former LEO in the prison system. Once word of what he used to be gets around the house, they'd be lining up around the block to get at him.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 284 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 2:39 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good afternoon Gents. I returned from LV yesterday afternoon. The wife and I are still trying to recover. That place is just nuts. Where else will someone hand you flyers advertising hookers when you are with your wife.

My grandfather claimed never to have had a hangover or a single headache in his life. He was an alcoholic, so I'm not sure whether that's a good thing or not. Great if you can resist the temptation to be loaded all the time, not so great if you can't. My BIL can drink ungodly amounts of alcohol, and mix wine, beer, and stronger spirits during the same binge without apparent effect. He quit drinking recently, freaked out over the amounts he was drinking.

As for me, I can get sick real easy and once had a hangover that lingered for almost 48 hours. I pay a heavy price for my fun.

SWAT, sorry to hear about your fallen brethren. But I'm glad to hear that your WW is not putting up with OM's nonsense. And I can relate to your "she sure can pick 'em" mindset, as I'm sure most of the menz can. The pool of men who are willing to wreck a marriage and accept another man's sloppy seconds doesn't include many high class players I would imagine. And let's face it, our WWs are not winners themselves while in that mindset.

It's an unholy alliance of the desperate and the dishonorable.


Me (BS)-45, WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 9-10 month PA/EA
M - 18 years, 4 children
Reconciling
PM's w/ male members only please

Posts: 1408 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
sunsetslost
♂ Member
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 3:44 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Greetings from Kiel Wisconsin! I got volunteered to go get my grandparents and transport them to my brother's wedding last Saturday. (it sucked for me. there's a thread on D/S page if you care). Not much to do here. Lots of large pasty white people. But the beer is cold and cheap. Sneaking cigarettes out the back door like the good old days. We will fly to the next one though. Not enough nicotine gum in the fucking world for Chicago traffic while an 88 year old gums down an apple next to you.
I'll see some family and head back on Thursday. There's a redhead at the hotel in Indiana that I may stop and visit with some more.
Some time shortly after Memorial Day my happy ass is heading to the beach for good. Party at Sunsets. Attendance is mandatory gentlemen.


Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 759 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
BAMAC
♂ Member
Member # 39334
Default  Posted: 6:58 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just got a settlement offer from her attorney. She wants one of my dogs, and the painting by my grandmother she gave us as a wedding present. Fuck that.


DDays - 1/26/2013 | 3/23/14
Divorced 7/10/2014

Posts: 84 | Registered: May 2013 | From: TX
foundoutlater
♂ Member
Member # 32900
Default  Posted: 8:43 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

SWAT Its a long road I am happy you were able to see a glimmer of hope.

Sunsetslost sounds like you will be spending some time finding those susnsets great news.

BMAC FTN I would guess the dog and the painting are going to be used by her to negotiated a better settlement from you the system just sucks.

As for hangovers Im with Tred. I have never had one. The closest I have come was waking up drunk and I had actually puked (only time that ever happened). Yeah its not a matter of not having drank enough, its just dumb luck.


Your beliefs dont make you a better person, your behavior does.

Posts: 1131 | Registered: Jul 2011
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 9:26 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sal, welcome back. Lol, really? Fliers?

BAMAC No chance brother. Your Grandmother did it. It's yours.

Tred, FOL, no words brothers.

Sunsets.......Jealous even with the gumming incident

SWAT. Peace brother.


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2871 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
sunsetslost
♂ Member
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 11:09 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Grandpa Bob is a great man. He's not my biological grandfather. Real gramps passed when I was 8. He's been married to Grandma for 22 years. I'm not sure when his first wife passed. It was before my biogical grandfather.

Bob is my hero. He's a real life hero. B-17 side gunner in WW 2 in Europe. He is the most kind, gentle, God fearing man I've ever been associated with. Had a beer in Indiana waiting for take out food. Grandma was spent from the travel. It was the first beer we've had together since the day after my wedding. He took a picture of my grandmother and told me "Joey, this is a valuable picture. This is the first beer your grandma has ever had at 2 in the afternoon".

It was an honor to drive them


Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 759 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 7:23 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Because these sentences appear back-to-back:
I was kind of in a fog so I wasn't paying attention at first. For the first time since I suspected she was cheating. I saw my wife again. The beatiful and kind hearted woman I fell in love with.

...it suggests an idea to me.

- firstly, make sure it's not the fog speaking, or what you wish it to be clawing at your heart, because in truth, she isn't that woman anymore, is she?
That's why I subscribe to the "New M" idea - make it new swat. With all the real ingredients. The ones you want, because honestly, what you got there? With all the raw ingredients? Sounds delicious. The time it takes to (correctly, justly, rightly) bake that new cake is worth it, because the raw ingredients: true remorse showing itself in actions over time - are real. Something you can work with. Something worth working with.
The song of true remorse makes me vibrate like a tuning fork. Like Psalm 51. Makes words and thoughts and visions be born inside me. If it's true? I hope and pray it gets to vibrate in you.
It truly is.
Delicious.
I want that for you - every one of you.

If it's not? If it's wanting to take your dog, or your microwave after doing this damage to your soul?
Yeah. FTN.
Because,
party at sunsets!


Posts: 6617 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 8:42 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

jj, well spoken!


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2871 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 10:10 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

5454:
Sal, welcome back. Lol, really? Fliers?

Thanks brother. Yep, fliers and business cards. There's no shame in Vegas. If you hit the street (on The Strip) you can't walk 100 feet without someone trying to hand you something like that.

SWAT, excellent advice from jj. Create a new M, under your rules. Because right now there's only one adult in the relationship, and it ain't your wife.


Me (BS)-45, WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 9-10 month PA/EA
M - 18 years, 4 children
Reconciling
PM's w/ male members only please

Posts: 1408 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
numb&dumb
♂ Member
Member # 28542
Default  Posted: 11:17 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey Sal,

You'd come back richer for the experience, but poorer in your checking account ?

Fliers. Look up Laughlin or Lake Tahoe. Smaller, but just as much fun.

jjct- spot on man.

Sunsets- WI isn't all bad. Those pale pasties are tough as nails. Kind of like rednecks, but with different accents. Besides Spring doesn't actually come to that part of the country until June anyway.


Me-35 her-35

DS 1, DD 6
Dday 8/31/11. ONS that occurred 3 years earlier. Lied to for 3 years.

Every truth comes to light in a long enough timeline.


Posts: 2555 | Registered: May 2010
sunsetslost
♂ Member
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 12:20 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

N & D,

I love it here. For the two months of the year it's habitable. It's actually in the 80's today. Locals are miserable. "how'd you get so tan?"


Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 759 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 1:43 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You'd come back richer for the experience, but poorer in your checking account ?

That sums it up pretty well numb. Actually I played the blackjack tables almost too a draw. After two days I was down a nominal amount, maybe $20-$30. The problem is that the days of $5 buffets that actually have quality food are long gone. That was the scene the first time I went in '92. They just wanted you there so they could take your money at the tables or slots. Now, everything is expensive. They must have figured out that some people come just for the vacation, and that the gamblers are going to gamble anyway whether everything else is cheap or expensive. So you get gouged on everything now except for the free drinks while you're playing. Bottom line, unless you have nice winnings you're going to leave that place a lot poorer than when you arrived.

I'll try your suggestions for alternative places some day. Vegas is something I can tolerate for a couple of days (max) every few years or so. Way too much chaos and stimulation for me.


Me (BS)-45, WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 9-10 month PA/EA
M - 18 years, 4 children
Reconciling
PM's w/ male members only please

Posts: 1408 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
WearingTheHorns
♂ Member
Member # 37916
Default  Posted: 2:26 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love it here. For the two months of the year it's habitable. It's actually in the 80's today. Locals are miserable.

A few years ago I got a job as a field interviewer for the University of Wisconsin Survey Center. Had to go to Madison for two weeks of training in July. Locals were complaining about the 80 degree heat. I'd just reply with "Are you kidding? This "heat" is April back home in Texas". I loved it there and want to go back again some day.


Dday: over a period of three days 11/14-16/2012.
EA/PA: ~ 2 1/2 years
EA/beginning PA: ~ 10 months

"What God has joined together, let man... no man put asunder" -Pastor at our wedding concluding the ceremony

2 Cor 12:9-10


Posts: 272 | Registered: Dec 2012
numb&dumb
♂ Member
Member # 28542
Default  Posted: 2:38 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah the thing I miss most about WI and I know this is the cliche of chliches is the cheese curds.

Fresh curds squeak when you eat them and are a little warm just out of the vat. They are good deep fried too. Not very healthy, but still good.



Me-35 her-35

DS 1, DD 6
Dday 8/31/11. ONS that occurred 3 years earlier. Lied to for 3 years.

Every truth comes to light in a long enough timeline.


Posts: 2555 | Registered: May 2010
WearingTheHorns
♂ Member
Member # 37916
Default  Posted: 3:37 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd never had cheese curds until I was there. The hotel we were in was right across the street from the capital and the weekend between training they had their farmer's market. Lordy there was some good food there, and someone had samples of curds. Can't say I was crazy about them, but I knew being in cheese country I had to try them. Kind of like when I had a 5 hour layover in Milwaukee on the way to Madison. No way I could be in Milwaukee and no have a beer.


Dday: over a period of three days 11/14-16/2012.
EA/PA: ~ 2 1/2 years
EA/beginning PA: ~ 10 months

"What God has joined together, let man... no man put asunder" -Pastor at our wedding concluding the ceremony

2 Cor 12:9-10


Posts: 272 | Registered: Dec 2012
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