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Newest Member: JRconfused (45363)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Get to see Condo today...
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 11:25 AM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am happy but sad at same time but I know it is for the best.

I mean if he can't totally leave OW alone for the sake of my sanity then there is nothing more to be done.

What I figured out was I don't want to live the other half of my life with memories of the last 5 years. I want my kids and grand baby to see me with out that sad look and unhappiness I have. You know the one where you know it will never be the same again.

I know I tried my hardest to fix this marriage, I sacrificed my respect, my values, morals, all my emotions, being hurt repeatedly for nothing. I waited, I threw fits, I screamed, I shut down, I begged, I pleaded, I cried, I prayed, nothing worked... Why because he doesn't want to change. Actually I don't know if a NPD can.

So, here I am ready to start a life that I don't have to look over my back or to be stabbed in the back. I don't have to feel in competition with a truly evil, immature, nut case, attention getting, most likely bi polar, whore, home wrecker, ugly inside and pretty much out. I don't have to do that anymore. I never had to but that is how I felt.

makes me ill that he lowered his standards so much. Even if he pleads he will never be with her. That doesn't fricking matter. What mattered was keep me safe and protected. What mattered was that you didn't love me enough to stop and go completely NC. You put yourself above me.

Its reality time again... Thank GOD!


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 12:30 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I want my kids and grand baby to see me with out that sad look and unhappiness I have. You know the one where you know it will never be the same again.

This is a great start, and is the same reason why I left. I would prefer my boys learned how to be a strong, confident single man, than continue to learn how to be a sad, depressed, trodden husband.

Over time, I realized that while this was a VERY important reason, I also had to realize that I deserve not to be sad, depressed, trodden upon.

You and I (and all the other betrayeds here) deserve to be happy, strong, confident, and RESPECTED. Your husband lowered his standards, and now you've raised yours. Neither one of you meet the others' standards anymore.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2110 | Registered: Jan 2013
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Isn't it weird that there's no cure for NPD? I hope the docs keep working on that one..

But everyone always wondered why you were with that loser. You're way out of his league

The kids was a big reason I left too. People stay for the kids, but man, the kids and I are having the best time. It's clean, and it's party time! I bought some strawberry shortcake ingredients for when they get home


So, uh, more about the condo???


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2335 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

t/j

Butterfly, here is the only known case where a cure for NPD was found: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r03L0NsFmiM

end t/j


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9827 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 1:33 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Butterfly,
The condo is from what I have seen beautiful. Vaulted ceilings, fireplace, deck, washer and dryer, microwave, ect. I am so excited to see it today.

Yes, I tried to stay for the kids but after awhile you finally understand that you are doing more harm than good for them when you are with a wh that is not truly R. They should not have to see that. No one should.
I want my kids to be proud of me. I want them to know that this is not the type of marriage I would want for them and that it is not the way a marriage should be. My kids are older but still, to see your mom with that sad look in her eyes, or the crying. I think they miss the mom that has spirit in her eyes, that fun loving mom who always had a smile.

I remember when I first starting working here (same time as A started) some of our therapist always said "it is so refreshing to see someone smile.. it makes my day to see you, always light hearted and smiling"... I kept that up after I found out but in my office tears flowed a lot. I want to be that person again without faking it.

I will let you all know how the condo goes.

Pass - we all deserve what you said... 100%


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 1:34 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

NatureGirl


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:49 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Vaulted ceilings, fireplace, deck, washer and dryer, microwave, ect. I am so excited to see it today.
Sounds fabulous, FwL! So glad you get to see it today.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25766 | Registered: Aug 2011
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 2:29 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Nik,
Maybe one day you can drive up and see it and have dinner with Quietstorm and I ...


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
1Kick at the Cat
♂ Member
Member # 31432
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Here are your virtual flowers and champagne.

Sit back and enjoy; but put the cork back on tightly on the champagne because you'll need it when Karma comes a'visitin'


Before you know it, all this pain will be as useless as the G in Lasagna. 1Kick@Cat

Posts: 475 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Florida, U.S.A.
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 1:02 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump for anybody that missed the cure for NPD.

You are the best NG


And I want a fireplace and a deck FWL! Jealous!

[This message edited by ButterflyGirl at 1:05 PM, May 17th (Saturday)]


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2335 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
IrishLass518
♀ Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 1:09 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

t/j Oh, NG if only that worked

Back to the thread, FWL I hope the condo is everything you envisioned for your New Beginning


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 2:09 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks guys.
Condo is beautiful. Can't wait.
July needs to come.
Found out....ow still texting..nothing new there..but he stated to someone...crib will be all mine again in about a month...I'm gonna try to get Nik here....( Nik is a female he has been trolling after) another person from work! And I think he may have done some dirt from a sex site( not positive tho) Lord he never stops....
It's so scary that this is who he is....
He can have all the women but not this one anymore. I'm to good for this!


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 2:16 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm gonna try to get Nik here....( Nik is a female he has been trolling after)
Way to give a girl a heart attack, FwL! Did he meet her through you? Does Nik know what he is?

It's so scary that this is who he is....
It's pathetic. This is a grown-ass man acting like a teenager.

He can have all the women but not this one anymore. I'm to good for this!
AMEN HALLELUJAH!


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25766 | Registered: Aug 2011
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Gentle 2 x 4.

Found out....ow still texting..

And just hooooow did you find this out? C'mon girl, you got better things to do than worry about what he's doing.. Pretend he's some shitty ass roommate you always ignore since he's such a FuckTard..

Just keep scraping him off the bottom of your shoe. You'll get it all off soon

t/j

I had a mild heart attack for a second there too NIK


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2335 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, May 17th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh shot sorry to scare you guys...
I don't know the poor girl. She is teacher where he works.
Butterfly, his phone went off and I saw it scroll. That's how I know about OW. I feel she gives him money...
It's just nice to know... the stuff I found out is the topping on the cake. I didn't know how sleepy h was till I saw the hook up stuff. Just nasty.
20 years and he still never gonna go up. I never knew someone needed so much attention.


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2791 | Registered: Aug 2011
GingerAle
♀ Member
Member # 33822
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so happy you love the condo!! I hope July gets here quickly for you


My WH (The KISA, NPD) 6 month EA in 2010
2 other EAs in 2012 & 2013
Filed for D 7/2014


Posts: 425 | Registered: Nov 2011
Topic Posts: 16

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