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Newest Member: kelmac284 (44914)

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User Topic: I will never understand how wh could...
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No, no. I meant did you blow off karmahappen's post because you posted "no thanks" before you edited and added "sistermilkshake" so I thought you were saying "no thanks" to karma's post.

I don't think you are a shitty person at all. I feel you are a very hurt, sad and depressed person and it is sad that you are just wasting your life feeling this way and not doing anything to heal or move forward. That is all.


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9642 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sunflower...

I am karma, she was talking about me but retracted when she realized she was incorrect.

(((hugs))) to both you and sister.


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3800 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
sunflowergirl30
♀ Member
Member # 28979
Default  Posted: 12:53 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Im angr. Im angry at myself most of all. I see everything clearly. I dont need a reality check. Im not coming here to SI to be babied. I come because i know there are men and women here who are just as lost or hurt and they get it. I dont have to break it down or prove i didnt deserve to be cheated on. I appreciate your honesty sister and i know you mean well. Im just defensive


Together 20yrs married 17yrs
2 kids, now 18 & 15
Bw: now 37
Wh: now 36
Mow: now 49
1st D-day EA w/mow our realtor 4-?-2007, 2nd D-day PA w/ same mow 5-29-2010

Posts: 1060 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Pacific Northwest
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 12:54 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(not sarcastic)


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9642 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
alienstookmyexH
♀ Member
Member # 38452
Default  Posted: 4:52 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sunflowergirl30.

I have felt exactly the same for 5 years. I think my pain is that he still has control. After 5 years they are supposed to be garnishing his wages but he will still have control, just not as much. One day at a time. Big hugs!


Posts: 60 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: CA
sunflowergirl30
♀ Member
Member # 28979
Default  Posted: 7:01 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for listening everyone. Sistermilkshake thanks for the ration of shit! Lol <3

Sometimes im so frustrated and on edge :(


Together 20yrs married 17yrs
2 kids, now 18 & 15
Bw: now 37
Wh: now 36
Mow: now 49
1st D-day EA w/mow our realtor 4-?-2007, 2nd D-day PA w/ same mow 5-29-2010

Posts: 1060 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Pacific Northwest
redrock
♀ Member
Member # 21538
Default  Posted: 7:41 PM, March 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((sunflower)))

Sometimes you just have to vent. And when you do it is hard to get the wood to the cranium that you probably need, but are in no mood to receive. I get it.

If limbo is your choice, it is. It is hard path, probably one of the hardest ways to move forward after infidelity.

So how are you going to work on you to move forward? I was asked how I could improve myself 1% by our MC once. And I had no ready answer.

She pointed out to me that people in general, love talking about, questioning and pining over the big arcs of our lives. But you change those arcs in VERY small steps that you repeat over and over again until they become your new pattern.

So boring, so tedious, and yet so effective.

All the loss and pain that you feel is justified. The best way to put it in perspective is in very small pieces. By building your own foundation piece by little piece. You are worthy of his love and effort. But if he isn't able to give it then you have the ability to give it to yourself. To build your own life and support system.

Tonight you may not be in the mood to hear that you can make things better- even in limbo- because today limbo is sucking so hard. but come back and talk tmrw. or next week.

One of the things I love best about SI is that the people here ask questions. The tough ones, the funny ones and the ones that piss you off- the kind that no one can really know or ask until you've been through this shitty with a side of crappy experience.

We want the very best outcome for you. I have hugs for tonight. big ones. And want to know what your 1% is tmrw. Hang in there.

PS- My 6th anti-versary is in about 3 hours. It doesn't really hurt as much as haunt. I am here tonight. Licking my wounds a bit more that a 'healed' person should. I still have some percents to go I guess.

[This message edited by redrock at 7:49 PM, March 22nd (Saturday)]


I don't respect anyone that can't spell a word more than one way:)

Posts: 3156 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Michigan
Topic Posts: 27
Pages: 1 · 2

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