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User Topic: I need sleep!
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 12:46 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

All things considered, I think I'm holding up as well as I can despite the plateful of shit sandwich. I say that, but I also know I can hit a low point at any time for seemingly any reason. One thing I still have much trouble consistently with however is sleep.

In the first few week's following d-day, I drank way too much and basically passed out to get any "sleep." I'm sure most of you know the many reasons this isn't the best method, but at that time, it really was the only thing that worked at all. Since, I've cut the drinking waaay back (though it is Friday and I'm prolly gonna overdo it tonight), started exercising regularly, keeping a mostly consistent sleep schedule, generally doing many of the things recommended to help with insomnia. I find most nights I fall asleep pretty quickly, but either dreams (or more nightmares of her) wake me up early and often. Even if my dreams aren't the issue, I still wake up almost in full-blown panic mode many nights. I do have an anxiety RX (alazopram) that helps somewhat, but it still doesn't change the fact that I keep waking up over and over.

I recently read up on Valerian root, and again, its helped with the calming effects to help me get to sleep, but I still don't stay asleep (and Valerian root smells HORRIBLE). I've had some real bad experiences with prescription sleep aides which pretty much rules them out. I should also add I haven't been able to sleep in my bed much since d-day. While I have very good reason to believe the A never occurred in our home at least, it is still the bed we shared, and sleeping in a recliner is starting to mess with my back. I need to somehow get over that as that bed was so damn comfy.

Anyway, just wondering if there are any of you out there that have been able to find something that works for you. I'm so tired of being tired...


"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn." - C.S. Lewis

Posts: 880 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
MovingUpward
♂ Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd contact your doctor. Maybe you med is causing this.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51515 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hmm, good point. Didn't think the medicine that helps relieve anxiety may be the cause, but it's a good question to at least ask. I have talked to my doctor about this topic in general (hence me having the anxiety medicine, and hence me discovering RX sleep aides and I do NOT mix well), but another conversation could be in order.

You'd think I would have thought of that if you were me. What I mean by that is many medicines have always had the opposite effect on me than what is intended. Nyquil makes me wired. Sleeping pills make sleep impossible. I tried antidepressants again since d-day and rediscovered why I had to stop taking them before - they seem to amplify depression symptoms in me. Stands to reason an anxiety med may also have the opposite effect.

Thanks for the suggestion!


"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn." - C.S. Lewis

Posts: 880 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
norabird
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Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 1:09 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sleeping on a recliner, ow! What about buying an inflatable mattress? Should be affordable. Or get a new mattress if you can't face the old one, which I understand.

I think once the D is final you will sleep better too. If I wanted to sleep during the last month of false R (I mean get any sleep period, at all), I had to take ambien; after the second Dday bam, I could sleep again. I think the finality (even though it will be a painful finality) should help.

But do try to get on some kind of mattress at night!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 3735 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
LostSamurai
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Member # 41347
Default  Posted: 1:11 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My meds, cause me to sleep and dream real good...however, i think they are causing me to have ED...


I am now nothing by a mere Ronin.

Posts: 1029 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Maryland
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 1:33 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think once the D is final you will sleep better too. If I wanted to sleep during the last month of false R (I mean get any sleep period, at all), I had to take ambien; after the second Dday bam, I could sleep again. I think the finality (even though it will be a painful finality) should help.

I am hopeful that once things are finalized, that will be the case. Even the "easiest" divorce or break-up is stressful. Being that it is Friday, and I don't have anything going on tomorrow that requires me to be anywhere at a specific time, I may try my bed tonight. Worst case, I mosey back out to the chair, but at least I won't feel the pressure of the clock. I've changed to all new sheets and pillows and all that already, but if I can't make this mattress work, I may have to buy a new one (even though the one I have is less than 2 years old).

My meds, cause me to sleep and dream real good...however, i think they are causing me to have ED...

You know, for a good night's sleep, I don't know that I'd care right now . That said, at some point I know I'm going to want to share a bed with someone again, so, yeah...


"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn." - C.S. Lewis

Posts: 880 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
nowiknow23
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Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:41 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My DD is a "opposite effect" person, too. She has sleep issues and has had success with an old school sleep aid - trazodone. May not work for you, but thought it worth a mention just in case.

I have "brain train" issues that impact my sleep, and anxiety meds (currently Xanax) helps me with that, but my problem is more in falling asleep than staying asleep.

Hope you get some relief soon, SH.


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24436 | Registered: Aug 2011
MadeOfScars
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Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 1:53 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks NIK, I will ask my doctor about trazodone. Can't say I've ever heard of it before, but if it works for your DD, it's worth a shot I would think.


"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn." - C.S. Lewis

Posts: 880 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:55 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actually - let me double check the name. I might have it confused with one of her other meds. I'm TERRIBLE with drug names. They all sound alike to me.

ETA: Verified it is trazodone. Nothing to see here.

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 1:58 PM, March 21st (Friday)]


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24436 | Registered: Aug 2011
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 2:34 PM, March 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks again NIK!


"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn." - C.S. Lewis

Posts: 880 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
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