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Newest Member: PTSD (44945)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: so many fears
SeekingPeace84
♀ Member
Member # 42765
Default  Posted: 5:05 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just wanted to add my voice to the others who are proud of you for doing the right thing, even though it's so hard! Best of luck and I'll be praying for wisdom for you.

(((((Imissmyhub)))))


Me: BS
Him: WH (3 month OEA)
Known each other all our lives, Together 5.5 yrs, Married 4 yrs.
D-day: 3/8/14
Separated 3/8/14 and currently seeking IC

Posts: 56 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: USA
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 9:20 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found out that he applied for an apt, after tellg me he wants to try to work things out. Why hasnt he mentiond thy he is actively looking to move out?
He did suggest separatg which i posted abt in anothr forum, but this is a big move he is makg in silence. Wow


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
lastdance
♀ Member
Member # 42401
Default  Posted: 10:13 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

why are you still surprised?????........he is a cheater and a liar........do you actually believe anything he tells you??............you need to wake up..........he is already out the door.......this is what he wants..........he wants out,but will let you think it is what you want.........no contact and 180.....quick.....make him miss you

Posts: 153 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: orlando, fl
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 9:38 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just removed him from my mastercard!
Next, set L consult

I know im movg slow but Im really tryg. this is painful

[This message edited by Imissmyhusb at 9:42 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday)]


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
hewasmine
♀ New Member
Member # 42727
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have just been reading your thread here. You don't know it yet but your strength is building day by day. I have seen you grow and change just while reading these posts. You have to start living for yourself and your children. You said many of the women in your family have allowed themselves to be abused. You will break the cycle and teach your children better. Just know that when you see your kids upset by this they will be OK in the long run. You have to look at the big picture. Don't let another generation of your family accept abuse as a normal part of life. Fight for your kids well being and the well being of their future families. I am sorry you are going threw this. I think you should work with the other BS on this. Together you two stand a better chance then each of you do alone. Start the 180 today. You are worth way more then your husband is giving you. Demand love, respect and transparency or don't even consider R. Once you have seen a lawyer lay out what you expect from your WH and if he won't comply send him on his way. He doesn't deserve any more of your time if he is not doing what you want him to do.

Posts: 2 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: USA
NeverAgain2013
♀ Member
Member # 38121
Default  Posted: 11:36 AM, April 2nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Imissmyhusb, as painful as it may be, now is NOT the time to move slow.

Summon up every little bit of courage and energy you have and get to a lawyer TODAY.

Your husband clearly does NOT have your best interests at heart at ths point. As horrific as it is to have to digest that fact, the bottom line is that you can no longer count on him being loyal to you and the children, nor can you count on him having yours and your children's best interests at heart. He's made it very clear that he's looking out for Number #1 and that's it. I'm so sorry, it's an ugly fact but it's your reality that you have to deal with.

You need to get to a lawyer IMMEDIATELY. Forget your aching heart, forget your battered soul, forget your devastation.

For the moment.

Swallow it all and get to a lawyer. You need financial protection NOW, Imissmyhusb. Before this man cleans you out and leaves you hanging on the clothes line. Please get an appt. with a lawyer NOW.

Good luck to you.


Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.

Posts: 1753 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 2:14 AM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you! U guys know my pain

Any suggestions on what to say to OWH?


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 2:14 AM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Duplicate post

[This message edited by Imissmyhusb at 10:25 PM, April 20th (Sunday)]


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 11:19 AM, April 14th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I contacted the OWH

He was very forthcoming with what he knew and i will be in contact w him to share info

Thanks for the 2x4s. I still hav a ways to go


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
Imissmyhusb
♀ Member
Member # 42734
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I plan to confront my H this week or next week. We hav a home business and i need him for some of the work so im not sure how the confrontation will affect that

OBS seems to really want to save his M but he sees that she is not truly remorseful. She confessd to a PA w my H but WH has yet to even acknowldg this A to me.

My plan is to put a few items of clothg in a bag with a letter i wrote cursing him out and the evidence (emails and facbk chats). I will drive to his ofc and leave it in the drivers seat of his car. (Stole that from another poster). The letter says that i dont want him to come home. I do want him to at some point, but the goal is that he gets a shocking realizatn of whats at stake. What do u think?


Met '95 - dated '97 - married '03 - dday '13
3 kids 7y and 4y twins, me - sahm since '07, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.

Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
Topic Posts: 50
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