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Newest Member: Gladiator5 (45339)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Just popped in to say hello!
beammeout
Member
Member # 3719
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was an early member here - in 2004!!

DDay - my 19th anniversary on 1 Sept.

Dreadful divorce.

Had a subsequesnt 4 year relationship and quite a few shorter ones since then.

The OW died a year after I and my X separated. He went on to marry another unfortunate woman. She then found him on a gay website describing himself as bisexual - and she found he had cheated with another woman. She divorced him and now she and I are good pals!!

I have lots of male "suitors", but you know what I am quite happy on my own - in fact I am the happiest I have probably ever been. I have raised my two kids on my own. We are very close and they have done very well. I have lots of interests and I am committed to growing old very disgracefully!!

I have worked hard. While my X has fallen on hard times, I can see that I will have a comfortable old age.

I would only be with somebody now if they treated me like a princess, they are financially sound, physically fit and attractive etc etc. Otherwise they get shown the door!

I never believed almost 10 years ago I would get to this stage of contentment again. But it does happen. If anybody is out there and reads this, I just wanted you to know peace and contentment after divorce can indeed happen.


Posts: 571 | Registered: Mar 2004
somanyyears
♂ Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 2:48 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


..
I am committed to growing old very disgracefully!!

..

You sound happy...all the best to you!

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 67
Her 63
Married 42 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4129 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 3:13 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awesome post!!! I'm so happy to hear how well you are doing.

Posts: 35870 | Registered: Mar 2011
Exit Wounds
♀ Member
Member # 32811
Default  Posted: 3:18 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh thank you for sharing that with us!
I have two kids...boy 13 and girl 15 and I am saddened by the fact that they NEVER get to see their dad (his choice). Your post truly gives me hope...

Thank you!


Posts: 2486 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: With my dad...and my dog...
wonderingbull
♂ Member
Member # 14833
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WB


The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time...

James Taylor


Posts: 5982 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: A better place
beammeout
Member
Member # 3719
Default  Posted: 3:41 AM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Exit Wounds, my kids do not see their father either. They do not want to see him. Son is 21 and daughter is 18. I believe their upbringing has actually been better without him. He was never interested in his daughter and there was always friction with his son. They have grown up in a home with lots of love and no discord.Had the father been around my guess is that there would have been rebellion and endless tears.

My son has scars. I have wanted him to get therapy. He says he will go this year after finishing his genetics degree. We have open communication - I get late night calls when he has an argument with his girlfriend and we discuss things. My daughter met her boyfriend at high school two years ago and they are like a little old married couple.

I dont think any kids have a perfect childhood. There is always something, isnt there? I always say to mine that life is not meant to be perfect and easy. We just get on with it. I am persuading my son to have a year off this year to hang around the sailing club and have fun!

With your Ex being so dysfunctional that he doesnt want to see his kids - I think you are probably lucky he doesnt see them!


Posts: 571 | Registered: Mar 2004
risingfromashes
♀ Member
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 6:55 AM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage



If anybody is out there and reads this, I just wanted you to know peace and contentment after divorce can indeed happen.

Thank you for coming back to post such a positive message. I too am a 2004 member. I, unfortunately, took a longer road (false R for years) to finally get here. You are so right!

Glad you are well and thriving.


There is life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1668 | Registered: Mar 2004
better4me
♀ Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 7:45 AM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you for your post. I'm generally pretty happy in my New Beginning but the bumps in my road can be discouraging. It is good to get the "long view" from someone further on the path. It's almost like I heard a "Keep going, it will be okay" from you, beammeout.


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3209 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
beammeout
Member
Member # 3719
Default  Posted: 8:39 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As Churchill said - when you are going through hell, keep going!!

I have had lots of bumps too. I have had to look very carefully at myself to figure out why my marriage did not work and why subsequent relationships have not worked out. My divorce took away a lot of my self esteem and I now have to be very careful when I date any man to make sure I am getting the respect I deserve.

But all in all, it is very good. I tell everybody I am am very happily divorced!


Posts: 571 | Registered: Mar 2004
Topic Posts: 9

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