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Newest Member: Cche (45068)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Confrontation is tomorrow!
veronique12
♀ Member
Member # 42185
Default  Posted: 12:09 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((castanella)))


BW: me (38)
WH: 43
OW: false "friend"
D-Day: 11/29/13 (4 month EA discovered); 12/19/13 (discovered was also PA); TT thru 2/14
Married: 2001; Together for nearly 20 years
2 beautiful young kids

Posts: 508 | Registered: Jan 2014
jb3199
♂ Member
Member # 27673
Default  Posted: 1:36 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good luck.

Remember, things rarely go as scripted---and that is okay. Just focus on staying strong, and don't accept anything out of his mouth that doesn't make sense.

You can do this. Sending you strength.


BH-46
WW-44
2 boys-17 & 20(special needs)
Married 21yrs.(together 27yrs.)

All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary Puckett
D-Day: 9/18/09 D-Day#2: 2/19/10 The Marriage Killer: 6/6/11
Heading for D


Posts: 2054 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: northeast
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 1:50 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending you wishes for strength, peace, and comfort... Hugs too. The waiting has got to be just awful. I, too, hope you have made arrangements to sleep elsewhere with the kids tonight. Do you have family or friends that can provide support for you and help with the kids? I was an emotional wreck on Dday and the next day when we told our kids he was moving out. I was taken by surprise and had no time to plan a reaction. It would have been wonderful to have some real life support to turn to...

But we are here to give you any support you need!


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 692 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
I think I can
♀ Member
Member # 17756
Default  Posted: 2:24 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stay strong!

Also, BtraydWife, I believe #5 is crucial to reconciliation in this instance. My fwh didn't stop cheating until I kicked him out, told the world, and drew a HARD line in the sand.


I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

Posts: 8816 | Registered: Jan 2008
trustagain
♀ Member
Member # 16921
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending peace and strength to you!!


WH - 48
BS (me) - 50
Son - 25
Son - 17
Dday #1 - 10/31/07
Dday #2 - 12/23/07
Dday #1,000,000 - 12/23/09 - found out EA was PA
Reconciling or at least trying. We have reconciled through the A, but he still doesn't get it when it comes to p

Posts: 4472 | Registered: Nov 2007
Justgreatnews
♂ Member
Member # 41666
Default  Posted: 6:40 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I remembered reading this thread earlier, and wondered what happened. I guess this is mostly a bump, but I know how hard it is to have to anticipate such a confrontation. Nothing to look forward to, hard to initiate, the pits.


Posts: 261 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: United States
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 7:17 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((Hugs))

Sending strength and calm thoughts.

Please let us know how it went when you can (if you want to!).


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
BtraydWife
♀ Member
Member # 42581
Default  Posted: 7:46 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I agree that #5 has to happen I was just thinking of different wording is all. She certainly needs to draw a line in the sand.

I hope you are doing well castellana


Me-BW
Him-WH
DD-March 2010
TT for 6 months
Unremorseful for 3.5 years

Delay is the deadliest form of denial. - C. Northcote Parkinson

Your standards aren't up for negotiation just because he/she can't meet them.


Posts: 1762 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: United States
momentintime
♀ Member
Member # 16394
Default  Posted: 11:27 PM, March 4th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Have we heard from castanella? I hope she is alright.


BS-me FWS - him
D-day 8/04
R'd

"Global editing disclaimer - I edit almost everything I post, and I am not going to post why every time."...re: Bionical girl


Posts: 2982 | Registered: Sep 2007 | From: New York
Getting to Happy
♀ Member
Member # 35200
Default  Posted: 11:52 AM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((castanella)))))

Stay strong sister.


WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...

Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown


Posts: 1140 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: La La Land
sinsof thefather
♀ Member
Member # 29295
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thinking of you. (((castanella)))


...second star to the right and straight on till morning.

Posts: 1877 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: UK
Truly
♀ Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 2:33 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey (((((castanella)))))

The sun just came up on a new day here. Thinking of you, hoping your days are looking brighter.

x


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 257 | Registered: Sep 2013
BtraydWife
♀ Member
Member # 42581
Default  Posted: 4:17 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Another one thinking of you. I hope you are ok.


Me-BW
Him-WH
DD-March 2010
TT for 6 months
Unremorseful for 3.5 years

Delay is the deadliest form of denial. - C. Northcote Parkinson

Your standards aren't up for negotiation just because he/she can't meet them.


Posts: 1762 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: United States
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 4:46 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Also checking in.... was hoping to hear from you. I sincerely hope you are doing okay....


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 692 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
ruby44
♀ Member
Member # 41135
Default  Posted: 4:56 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is what I hate, waiting to hear if all is OK. Sure hope all is well.
Hugs to you.


Me BW 52, Him WH 48
Married 13 years,
2 DDs (12 and 10)
D-Day Confirmed 10/24/13 suspected before that but did not want to believe it.
WH filed for D 11/12/13
2/8/14 WH asked if he could come home.
Lies!

Posts: 277 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Midwest
Getting to Happy
♀ Member
Member # 35200
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just checking in.

Hope you are okay.


WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...

Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown


Posts: 1140 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: La La Land
lastdance
♀ Member
Member # 42401
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

spent hours praying for you and your safety----we all support you at this time------we all want your safety first-------sending love your way

Posts: 153 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: orlando, fl
SadInNC
♀ Member
Member # 42170
Default  Posted: 7:18 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hoping that you and the kids are ok. Hugs.


BS/Me WH/Him

"Your value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth." -Unknown Wise Person


Posts: 339 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: North Carolina, United States
still-living
♂ Member
Member # 30434
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thinking of you.


BH(me)47
WW 47 FOO Issues
DDay 11/09 Coworker
High School Sweethearts
Married 06/91
8 months TT
Sons 19 and 14
Recovery is constructing a pyramid of inference from which to see clearer.
The process involves using the reflexive loop.

Posts: 749 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Ches
forgivinglola
♀ New Member
Member # 35601
Default  Posted: 9:20 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hope you're doing okay and that the confrontation went as well as it could.


DDay: 10/13/2009
Status: In R

Posts: 4 | Registered: May 2012 | From: MI
Topic Posts: 42
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