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Okay, just venting, procrastinating getting ready to go out with a bunch of neighborhood soccer moms...one of which is in the same hell as me but none of these happily marrieds know about the hell either of us is in so it will all be hush hush...anyway

Here is the note I got from Mr. Integrity when I asked him for the second time to either switch weekends with me, or I offered him first right refusal as I have to get a sitter 2x this weekend. This is from the ahole who said his main priority is the kids and he wants more time....

AND WHY DOES HE TALK LIKE SUCH AN ARROGANT AHOLE. This note could have been one line, "i will get back to you about switching weekends" without any of his added perceptions and opinions and bullshit about stuff he wants me keep saying so someone may start to believe it...just sharing what an ahole he is AHHHHH want to punch him in the pie hole

Dear Sleepless-

Thank you,

WTF! Did he swallow a thesaurus? Or does he think he's Charles Dickens and getting paid by the word?

OMG. He really thinks he's all that, doesn't he? It was aggravating just to read, so I can only imagine what it's like for you.

I'd send back: "k".

I'd send back: "k".

Next time you make a request you set a deadline. "If you do not exercise your FRR BY DATE TIME I will make other arrangements without further notice."

The sad clown used to pull this shit too until I broke that button he was pressing by setting a deadline. He's a good doggy now and does the same to me. I prefer it this way as it reduces the idle chit-chat.

They all pull this Father of The Year crap - ironic how "for the children" becomes oh, so important to them after blowing their lives up. As in an M it's all bullshit words - no action behind them. Whatevs dude. You can pretend all you want. We both know what you are and my kids will too someday.

I'd send back: "k".

^^^ This... I just spit all over my computer screen...

this reads to me as if it's written for a child custody audience. Especially where he says "as we graduate to my request for equal parenting time."

He is creating a "record" of being accommodating, incredibly worried about the girls' stability, and excruciatingly "reasonable"

Unfortunately for him, he sounds like a complete douche.

Mirror the response with:

Dear Arrogant A-hole,

Since your training class this weekend will preclude your ability to find 2 minutes to review the schedule, then of course you can address solutions or alternatives to my request next week.

I have a training class this weekend that precludes my ability to look deeply at the schedule. I will look at it next week and will get back to you with suggested changes that addresses your request.

Well thank you Mr. Helper. Waiting until next week to look at your schedule is really going to help out a lot THIS WEEKEND!!!

While I am always open and flexible to discussing changes to meet your needs and as we graduate to my request for equal parenting time, constant change to schedule causes unnecessary confusion for DD1 and DD2.

If you guys don't yet have a placement schedule that has been signed by a judge....you really need to mind your p's and q's here because, even though it is pretentious as hell, he is using language directed towards a *decider* and he seems to be trying to *set you up*.

this reads to me as if it's written for a child custody audience. Especially where he says "as we graduate to my request for equal parenting time."

He is creating a "record" of being accommodating, incredibly worried about the girls' stability, and excruciatingly "reasonable"

^^My first thought too! After I got beyond the bile:

Be sure to save this email and send it back to him whenever he asks for a change!

He is creating a record for the court.

He is taking control by telling you to wait until he gets around to responding. Unless he is training for the fucking Olympic games, the dumbass has time.

He is tying his equal time request to your request. They tend to want equal time to minimize child support. Money is generally the name of the game, sad as it may be.

Thank him for his response and request a final response to your initial inquiry by COB 05 Mar 14. His timely response will allow adequate time to prep the girls for any future changes to their schedule.

What a fucktard.

This would be my reaction. Kudos to you for not murdering him.

[This message edited by haysuth01 at 6:52 PM, February 28th (Friday)]

OMG, that reads like a pretentious pompous ahole wrote it.

this reads to me as if it's written for a child custody audience. Especially where he says "as we graduate to my request for equal parenting time."

He is creating a "record" of being accommodating, incredibly worried about the girls' stability, and excruciatingly "reasonable"

^^^ This. I agree, I also thought he is creating somekind of record for the court if needed while I was reading it..

What a tool. It sounds like he paid his lawyer to write it. Maybe he googled "how to sound like a huge douche" or "how to sound concerned about the kids I nuked when I cheated on their mother with a skank I found on the Internet" - because if so he nailed it.

And that's a sign of a man that no one listens to....he feels the need to over-speak himself, cause this is one of his only opportunities to do so....

I call it the "Professor complex."

After reading that, I would send back "Never mind, I've got it covered." and just get a baby sitter.

My X does this. It could be an email about the weather and it would sound like it belongs in the Declaration of Independence.

It's their NPD and a way for them to assert superiority and remain detached. Like a dog peeing on your leg, without the warmth and feeling.

I loved one2ndchance's reply. It's a little passive aggressive, but it gets the point that he's a d-bag across loud and clear.

Holy shit, lol

First of all, that's fucking hilarious. As were all the responses. Pompous asshole, I swear. But I totally agree, he's setting you up...

In the future, give a deadline on when he should get back to you to use his first right of refusal. Like, saying something along the line of, I have immovable obligations this particular weekend and want to extend the offer of additional time with the children or option to switch weekends....please let me know by such and such date if you this works for you. If I don't hear back by such and such date, I will make other arrangements for care for the children.

God dang, what an idiot. And right?! Who talks like that?

Oh My God, I laughed so hard at this thread that I had to go change my pants. It's really really funny and also really scary because I know the hostility there is behind those words. So much hostility and the poor kids have to live it.

Umm...

Did my XWH write that?

It's yet another chapter in the XWS Handbook: How To Sound Like An Overeducated Douchebag Who Really Cares About The Children So That You Can Talk Down To and Feel Superior To Your Ex.

Seriously. It's truly another part of their devolution from person to troglodyte as they continually seek to bolster their images with themselves and with anyone they know (or a court of law for that matter).

I love how your ex has to look "deeply" at the schedule. Is the schedule embedded in a holy text? Does it reflect the existentialist school of thought? Ay-yi-yi. Deeply.

It would have been nice if he had thought more deeply about, oh, I don't know, YOUR WEDDING VOWS!?!?

But yeah, most of them start spouting these arrogant, asshole missives. Sorry to say that it seems to be an integral part of the asshat XWS experience.