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Newest Member: JRconfused (45363)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: How to ask for divorce
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Normally, I would suggest doing everything possible to just gut out the 60-ish days until the separation agreement is final, and then file the very next day. However, given that your WH feels no remorse at all about blowing your money for his own selfish needs, over the needs of you and the children, I'd pay to have him served AFTER I changed all of the locks on the house. At least once he's served you can legally go after anything that he blows AND get a forensics accountant involved to chase the money down and see if you can negotiate you being paid that back by him getting less of your assets.

I also highly recommend that you go down to the Separation and Divorce forum and start posting there as well. They have all been there, done that, or are in the process of it, and can give you some great advice. You don't have to leave JFO! You can post in both places for support!

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 4943 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
♀ Member
Member # 16394
Default  Posted: 2:29 PM, February 13th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stop engaging with him. He blameshifts. He will not or cannot own his behavior so he strikes out at you. Stop that action dead. Don't engage, he needs to deal with your lawyer. If he gets this angry and hostile over a bill, then you need to keep your distance from here on out. He won't be nice, he won't be decent or civil. Resign yourself to that. There is no up side until you are free of him.

Don't get defensive, don't try to reason with him. It will do you no good. You don't need to rise to his bait. Just let his nonsense flow over and around you. Keep you head and trust yourself.

[This message edited by momentintime at 2:32 PM, February 13th (Thursday)]

BS-me FWS - him
D-day 8/04

"Global editing disclaimer - I edit almost everything I post, and I am not going to post why every time." Bionical girl

Posts: 2986 | Registered: Sep 2007 | From: New York
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