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User Topic: Contact with AP's AP?
KatieG
♀ Member
Member # 41222
Default  Posted: 3:18 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

There's a thread in Wayward about the AP leaving the BS alone. At first I couldn't relate to this because the APS doesn't know.

However, the AP had another AP (who is also married) and he has contacted me several times which has caused major issues in my relationship.

So the OW was having 2 As, one with my WBF and one with a MM.

I am now no contact with the MM as he has been very insistent that I tell him the details I know. I hold no loyalty to him and won't tell. I did suggest he tells his own wife though.

My WBF, the MM and the OW work together. It was agreed that WBF does no more work for either of them. And I was happy with that arrangement so we can concentrate on R and have no contact.

However, my WBF has just accepted some work with MM on the understanding they don't talk about personal matters and WBF has no contact with OW. I know this agreement is in place. He checked it out with me and I said yes. My issue is that the topic of the As will come up in conversation between them and we will return to the drama. MM is still seeing OW and I fear he still wants to get the details out of us.

Firstly, do we treat the MM as a BS? He is a WS as well, and should be loyal to his marriage.

And secondly, is it realistic to expect them never to speak of the A again when they are working together?


DD#1 - 6th Oct 13 - TT
DD#2 - 9th Nov 13 - Full disclosure
DD#3 - 12th May 14 - FOG lifted and in R
7 week A, 2 weeks together, rest phone and email - PA and EA

Posts: 485 | Registered: Nov 2013
million tears
♀ Member
Member # 24416
Default  Posted: 6:55 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. What a mess.

If the MM is still in the A, hell no, I wouldn't treat him like a BS. He needs to stay away from your WBF and keep his drama to himself.

Let me see if I have this right. The MM wants info about your WBF and the OW. The MM's wife cheated on him. Or are you saying the OW cheated on him? How is he a BS? If his wife doesn't know, she needs to.


2 year LTA-double betrayal, D-day 1-26-2009 and many months of TT. 2 more recent d-days-way overstepped boundaries.

Married 27 years. Together 29.

3 children 24, 21, 14

OW sex addict and romance addict according to MC.


Posts: 1664 | Registered: Jun 2009
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 7:41 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow! What a piece of work that MM is. Demanding details from you about the slut he is cheating with? And he has the audacity to feel he was cheated on because the slut was doing your WBF, too?

Why aren't you telling the MM's BS about his continuing affair? Is it possible that all 3 of the Slut Squad will get fired?

I don't know why you agreed to have WBF to accept some work with the MM. Doesn't sound like a friend of the "marriage" (I know you aren't married) and yes, I feel it is going to ramp up the drama.


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9801 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
KatieG
♀ Member
Member # 41222
Default  Posted: 7:52 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

million tears, the MM is saying his AP (OW) cheated on him with my WBF.
MM's BS and OW's BS do not know anything.

I have threatened OW that if she contacts WBF I will tell her BS and I have threatened MM that if he puts WBF in a situation with OW I will tell his BS.

I know you will say tell them anyway. But I want no further involvement with any of it.

SisterMilkshake - I know, he's a POS!

Yeah I agree, I think the drama will come back.


DD#1 - 6th Oct 13 - TT
DD#2 - 9th Nov 13 - Full disclosure
DD#3 - 12th May 14 - FOG lifted and in R
7 week A, 2 weeks together, rest phone and email - PA and EA

Posts: 485 | Registered: Nov 2013
lost_in_toronto
♀ Member
Member # 25395
Default  Posted: 8:05 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Firstly, do we treat the MM as a BS? He is a WS as well, and should be loyal to his marriage.

No. He is not, in any way, a BS. How hypocritical of him to say that his OW was cheating on him. That is...kinda stupid.

And secondly, is it realistic to expect them never to speak of the A again when they are working together?

Regardless of the intentions of your WBF and based on your descriptions of the relentlessness of the MM contact with you, I think the answer is probably no - I would think that the MM will probably attempt to bring up the A as soon as he has a chance.


Me: BS/39
Him: WS/37
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 14 years.
Reconciled.

Posts: 1679 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: not toronto anymore
KatieG
♀ Member
Member # 41222
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, January 31st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He is stupid, I think he feels he has a claim over OW because he was seeing her before (and during) WBF's A with her. He's so far in the fog, he thinks they are "together"! All the while his wife is a home!!


DD#1 - 6th Oct 13 - TT
DD#2 - 9th Nov 13 - Full disclosure
DD#3 - 12th May 14 - FOG lifted and in R
7 week A, 2 weeks together, rest phone and email - PA and EA

Posts: 485 | Registered: Nov 2013
Topic Posts: 6

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