Almost all ddays in his 9 month A were either on a birthday or on the birthday party, except his and our oldest sons but his adoption day is tainted by the beginning of his A so yeah. Our daughters 5th birthday was my initial dday, our youngest sons birthday party he spent most of texting her on his phone trying to make me believe they were over and he was not talking to her he was just talking to other people or just playing on his phone (he stood by this story even after I pulled up the phone records), our God sons birthday I kicked him out after finding out the A went underground and my nieces birthday is the following day of our god sons, so yeah I was still dealing with that. His birthday is the only one not tainted, how is that fair?
It's my birthday today, but all I'm thinking about is what he was doing 4 years ago without my knowledge, I was clueless, and planning my daughters birthday is extremely difficult. Why did his choices have to come out on such important days? Why couldn't they be just random days that have no significance? Birthdays are supposed to be happy times of celebrating life, not reminders of what your husband did behind your back and against your wedding vows!!!
Today I'm 31, today I am supposed to be enjoying life and what the year has in store, but instead I'm on a tail spin, losing control rapidly, I've had to drop my classes this term, my anxiety is thru the roof,I'm just simply not dealing very well at all with the way my life is going. 4 years ago (as of March 1st) I was in school and thriving there, I was able to set aside my home life and my wh's choices for those few hours, but now even my birthday sends me spiraling out of control. This is not how I expected to spend my 31st birthday!!!
Thanks for letting me get that out
My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.
[This message edited by Frankie80 at 7:27 AM, January 30th (Thursday)]
[This message edited by scangel3 at 9:18 PM, January 30th (Thursday)]
I know how bad tainted days suck. Maybe you could go buy yourself a present and forget about the assholes for a while. I know, easier said than done.
Since my WH had a LTA, every holiday is tainted for me. There were always texts or phone calls, maybe even sex. Even on both anniversaries, when we were away for the occasion, he was in contact with her. I'm sure he was saying how awful it was to be with me. During the A I sent him a text on my birthday. He waited 4 hours to text me back. During that time he texted her nonstop. I really feel for you. It's sad when they can turn a special day into one of misery.
Married 27 years. Together 29.
3 children 24, 21, 14
OW sex addict and romance addict according to MC.