It brought me more pain and gave her all the justification she needed that I was weak and her new man was strong.
I'm so glad you didn't send it.
You seem so much stronger than I was in the same timeframe
It could be that your STBXWW is deep in an emotional relationship with someone; it would be strange behavior to just quit a marriage after all you have been through together just to live alone in an apartment. Its unlikely she is by herself.
I don't agree with this at all. My exWW wasn't seeing OM (I blew that relationship out of the water believe me) and I still don't believe she's seeing anyone else. How do I know this? I've had conversations with friends of mine (their wives) whom have been out to dinner with her. She's made heavy duty comments to them why she can't seem to meet anyone and why men won't approach her. Yeah she thought she was "all that" becoming single again. My response? Well who would want to date her knowing she a lying adulteress who break up families?
Just because she ends things does not mean she's involved with someone. Like others have said, could be that she just thinks right now her life is better, she's free. In all, reality will begin to set in when she sees that all her friends are married and have other obligation over her like their kids, etc. She will get treated very poorly by other men who will use her and then she will realize "WTF was I thinking?" when they sleep with her and then poof on her. She'll be sitting home on Friday and Saturday nights with nothing to do but stare at a TV. Eventually she will regret her decision, but that won't mean she will be coming back. Possibly like my exWW they are so proud that they will never admit to it and try to fake it til they think they can make it. And in their minds they will still blame you because after all, you were SUCH a terrible, abusive husband.
[This message edited by SeanFLA at 8:57 AM, April 24th (Thursday)]
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley
In this case your wife is making no attempt to discuss her future or much of anything actually. Just letting the divorce happen. On the other hand you tell us it was an affectionate, soulmate kind of marriage. Strange contradiction.
If u do still give her the note i really hope Im wrong and u r thd exception. I really do for u cause i see how u desperately love her
I am not "happy" about it, but I'm making peace with the fact that D is the answer for me. I need to move on since, after all, she moved on before telling me. Whether or not she's currently with someone just flat doesn't matter. She's someone I used to know. There was a kind, caring, loving and true person there once, that I know. I still love that woman very much. That woman, however, is gone. The physical and soulless clone that walked out the door on d-day was not my wife. I don't want that person back. I want nothing at all to do with any person who could do what she did so heartlessly and selfishly. I am divorcing her because I deserve better, and I deserve to be happy. I get neither by begging and pleading to this shell of my former wife to come back into my life. I will always miss who she was, and who she was may emerge again. I doubt it until she takes a long look in the mirror and gets help, but that's not my issue anymore. She may wake up one day and realize she threw away the best thing to ever happen to her. If she does, then maybe she'll have a small taste of what she did to me - when you reach for someone you love when you need them most, and they're not there.
As for me, I'll be moving on to a brighter and happier future one step at a time. Peace and strength to you all.