I usually do it in bed either last at night or first thing in the morning. Like you say, juggling kids & a career isn't easy.
It's hard to make a decision when you're too tired to hold on and too in love to let go. ~ unknown
I have always worked and hobbies took a backseat many years ago.
Those hobbies may be a place to start. I went back to hobbies and activities I gave up when I married. I scheduled IC sessions for a few months to help process my stuff from the A and do some values clarification. Work on expanding your social network of friends so that you do not rely on Mr. Katz13 as your primary social outlet. I went back to bicycle commuting to work for exercise. Let Mr. Katz13 supply some child care (and houework while he is at it) while you get a evening or two a week to participate in something for you.
The work comes down to nurturing yourself, and the more demands you have to satisfy, the more self-nurturing you need.
What sort of practical help does your H give you? If he ups his effort, that could free up some time for you to use to nurture yourself. Taking pleasure in reading books is one way to do that.
Things like a trip to France with my kids, or some non-work-related conferences that would take some more planning than I usually do, a new motorcycle, getting back to being consistent with my workout routines, dropping a couple inches from my waist.
Then I looked through the excuses and started eliminating the ones that were BS or fear-based, picked out a couple for short-term goals and a couple for long-term goals, and started working towards them.
It's not all big stuff, but it's stuff I'm doing for myself that makes me feel good to be myself.
If you enjoy books, have you thought of starting or joining a book club? I love to read. My book club meets one evening per month and we take turns hosting. It is a night out with friends and often the books generate interesting discussion. It is a nice mental break to read a book that is not about relationships or infidelity. I have seen notices from book clubs who are looking for new members at local libraries and bookstores.