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Newest Member: feelostandlonely (45327)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Feel sick-his friends knew
♀ Member
Member # 23547
Default  Posted: 3:09 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes. My husband's law partner knew about his LTA partner, as she worked for them.

He still can't face me. As it should be.

I'm sorry.

FBS, been through the D marathon too.
Many D Days in April 2009
Multiple affairs, LTAs, and many OWs
Reconciled... There is hope! :)

Posts: 532 | Registered: Apr 2009
♀ Member
Member # 42581
Default  Posted: 4:16 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. On top of your spouse's betrayal you find out you can't trust so many more people who are/were close to you. I think this is really cruel of people. This is why OBS's should be told the truth too.

DD-March 2010
TT for 6 months
Unremorseful for 3.5 years

Delay is the deadliest form of denial. - C. Northcote Parkinson

Your standards aren't up for negotiation just because he/she can't meet them.

Posts: 1871 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: United States
♀ Member
Member # 34465
Default  Posted: 4:20 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((Kitty)) It does add another dimension to the betrayal.

My BIL knew, in fact, he and my H double dated!! (BIL was cheating too).

It hurt to think that BIL cared so little for me and my 2 children. (Though I guess if my own H didn't care... ) It was also humiliating to think that he knew more about my life than I did at one point.

Probably why I have not acknowledge him in 2 years.

You are responsible for your own happiness :)

Posts: 316 | Registered: Jan 2012
♀ Member
Member # 41218
Default  Posted: 4:43 PM, March 5th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It burns me up that WH's best friend knew. Makes me feel better to see that others understand why I feel that way. And yes, it's humiliating that some guy knew more about my M than I did.

For nearly three years he'd drop by my house occasionally to play cards with WH and make small talk with me like nothing was going on. During the A he even made a point of saying hi to me at a half marathon we both ran.

The guy has not shown his face at my house since I learned about the A. If I ever run into his W I will tell her all about the behavior her H is willing to tolerate...

Me - BW 36
Him - WH 41
Together 12 years, married 7
3 year LTA with former coworker
DDay 10/29/13
He says he wants to R... can I live with what he's done?

Posts: 164 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: United States
♀ Member
Member # 41939
Default  Posted: 6:51 PM, March 7th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So sorry to everyone who's had to deal with this. I guess it's a pretty common thing and what can you expect from the friends/family? I think it's even sicker to read about friends/family that were the cheerleaders. What the hell is wrong with people?!

For me, seeing pictures of him and his friends hanging out with this one other chick just made me feel like I was some joke, like I wasn't the real thing. I thought he had hidden this OW from everyone, but I was so wrong. What a hit in the head it was.

Me: BGF, 43
Him: WBF, 35
Together 9 years, moved in 8/15/2013

Posts: 98 | Registered: Jan 2014
♂ Member
Member # 40895
Default  Posted: 7:43 PM, March 7th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cut them out of your life. You don't need them. The best revenge is ignoring them and living your life to the max.

Posts: 198 | Registered: Oct 2013
♀ Member
Member # 34030
Default  Posted: 10:37 PM, March 7th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, many in their social club had seen them together and they knew what was going on. Not one said a word to me. After I had confronted, one of them told me ( she did not know I had confronted H) that if the bimbo had set eyes on my H, I had something to worry about. Really??? Then why didn't you say something when you, plus the bimbo and a few others from your f.... club were invited to my house to celebrate on two different holidays???
Then, when certain events took place, unfortunately, even though this woman is a slut and everyone knows it, 90% of the people in that club defended her. I wonder what they have to say now that they see her -once again- do the same thing to another H's wife...

For the second EA, not only didn't our "friends" knew it, but they protected him and did whatever they could to enable the EA not to mention one of the friends wanted to bring the AP down to our home to spend Spring Break with us and for her to be close to my H. Now how disgusting is this???

I won't be surprised if I find out that even more people knew and kept their mouths shut.

And once the storm is over, you wonít remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive.But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you wonít be the same person who walked in. Thatís what this stormís all about.Ē

Posts: 874 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Somewhere in the South
♀ Member
Member # 42148
Default  Posted: 9:23 AM, March 8th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It was like another layer of betrayal. In addition to having my heart broken, I felt like I was made to look like a fool. Those "friends" were eventually weaned out of our life. They showed their true colors and he was able to see they never had his best interest at heart.

Posts: 61 | Registered: Jan 2014
Topic Posts: 28
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