You know what NG? You will be. There is no doubt in my mind.
I read here about the fucked up exes who are trying so actively to destroy their BS's. And I see the lost, scared, angry, indignant, bewildered NORMAL fucking reactions to such cruel and unexplainable "evil." And I remember. I know what that feels like.
And then I hear the (oh, God, I am not crazy okay?) voices in my head that are the people who posted to ME saying things like
You can't make sense out of nonsense- when I would wonder WHY does he do this and that.
You can't control him, only one you control is you. (ugh, bit of a control freak here, and how I wish I could control everything... mumble, mumble the world would run better too...)
There is no co-parenting with an idiot. He will take your "helpful" suggestions and beat you up with it. Save the energy for reparenting the children when they come home.
TIME. It only took time and reading and listening to those who knew already what I was learning.
(((hugs))) and thanks for the compliments. I feel like I earned every step and I KNOW all of you will too. Because you are here and you are my "kin" and you see what CAN BE. Just keep walking. or swimming. or crawling on some days.
Thanks. a lot.