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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Merry Christmas from Stretch
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 1:56 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Seriously! I got a 7:05 am text saying just that. HA. I actually, almost almost feel sorry for the sad clown. It sure beats feeling sorry for me!!

Let's compare shall we? Because three years ago I was bawling, sobbing as my kids left my house in the snow to go celebrate with Stretch and the OW for 5 days. Today I am eating Christmas chocolate, elevating my foot, drinking an adult beverage and enjoying a few hours of quiet before the boys return home.

1. I have a beautiful tree decorated as a family. Stretch (so I have been told) has a large poinsettia.

2. I have extended family that has celebrated and supported us all season (and always). Stretch had a family dinner 3 weeks ago because everyone was "too busy" to get together today.

3. The boys are delighted with an abundance of gifts and the unwrapping and magic of Santa and stockings. They tell me dad said "no gifts this year."

4. The boys provided homemade gifts for me and wrapped them with pride. They are Christmas keepers for sure. The boys used money I provided to buy "something" to wrap for dad because I said they should give him something and they didn't want to make him something.

5. I sent happy boys out the door this afternoon, me still in pjs, no make up. Hugs from the boys who will be home later tonight because Stretch can't exercise his parenting time. And I wore all the confidence of a happy divorced exwife who knows I have it better.

6. The boys were showing their new tshirt, toys, and handing him wrapped gifts, with childlike enthusiasm. Him? He looked lost. And useless. Asking if I would be home tonight so he could drop the boys. Sure, and I might have smiled...

7. He has a court date looming for non-compliance with support order. He has to attend or a warrant will be issued. Me? I can attend if I wish. But I don't think it matters so much to me right now. I know what he ought to do, and he does to. He hasn't done it. And Christmas came anyway.

All in all, I LIKE my life. I like what it must look like looking in from the outside. And if he is feeling a wee bit sorry for himself? Well, that would please me just a bit.

Now I will read and enjoy my time with SI, and offer hugs and encouragement to those who need it. Because damn if it doesn't get better!!!


Me: 43, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 12 DS 9
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5290 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This made me happy. I'm glad you're doing OK through your ordeal. May you always come out smiling!


I promise to surround myself with amazing souls and love them fiercely.

Posts: 19154 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
ItHappened2Me2
♀ Member
Member # 32503
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I want to be you when I grow up!!!

What an uplifting post -- thank you caregiver9000!


BS - me (52); WS - him (52)
DD 15yo, DS 11 yo
Married 25 years (together 27+/-)
DDay #1 - March 18, 2011
DD #2 (after 3 + month TT and false R -- the affair had gone underground) - June 28,2011
DD3: June 19, 2013 - he started up again with the

Posts: 241 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Texas
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 4:16 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm lifting a ginger beer towards you! After we get through with the flooring, it will be a glass of wine.


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4101 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Gemini71
♀ Member
Member # 40115
Default  Posted: 5:14 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The best revenge is living well. I hope to be there next year.


Two steps forward and one step backwards, is still progress.

Posts: 985 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:30 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pfft!! Merry Krampus more like it.

LOVE this... especially this.

I actually, almost almost feel sorry for the sad clown. It sure beats feeling sorry for me!!

I sent happy boys out the door this afternoon, me still in pjs, no make up. Hugs from the boys who will be home later tonight because Stretch can't exercise his parenting time. And I wore all the confidence of a happy divorced exwife who knows I have it better.

I'm still at the crying after the girls leave stage because I won't see them for a week now but ditto to the rest of it right down to the no make-up (its hot here so my PJs are a little too skimpy for the outside world).

It is Boxing Day here and I spent last night with a bunch of my amazing friends drinking too much punch, singing songs too loud and dancing so much my bum cheeks hurt.


Sending all of the love and strength I can muster to Phoenix1 and her family.
"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."

Posts: 4523 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
JerseyCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 41441
Default  Posted: 6:33 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Last night I made a wish for all the BS's here on SI that a little good karma would come back to some. I have scoured theposts all day and you were #2! I want to see that good karma coming back to us is the best kind when we realize life is getting so much better...the best kind of revenge. Thank you for posting and giving hope to us that we will get our just rewards and please do enjoy your shining moment!


Me: Divorced 2012
I know that when I truly love & honor myself I am at my best & most complete; and I will never settle for anything less from myself or from anyone else ever again!

Posts: 225 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Have not decided where to land yet!
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It was a good moment. And then the Christmas nap was good too.

Much love to my D/S peeps!!

Christmas is almost over and we survived it.


Me: 43, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 12 DS 9
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5290 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awesome post cg9000!! This is YOUR karma (the sweet beautiful kind) for rising above the shit sandwich you were given. Enjoy today!


Me (BS): 42 Children: DD 18, DS 15
I FINALLY GOT A COURT DATE: 5/29/14!!

Posts: 1832 | Registered: Oct 2012
rainagain
♀ Member
Member # 14917
Default  Posted: 7:14 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

you go girl

Merry Christmas


Now, faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you cannot see. Heb 11:1
I done been through the pain and the sorrow the struggle is nothing but love. Maino
Me: Divorced BS 49
DS22, DD19, DS17

Posts: 1277 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Massachusetts
badmedicine
♀ Member
Member # 41692
Default  Posted: 7:26 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Now this says "Merry Christmas!" So happy for you, especially considering your post a few days ago and your ankle. May this confidence and satisfaction continue into the new year!


"The wishbone will never replace the backbone." -Will Henry
"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it." -Dorothy Parker

Posts: 133 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: United States
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 7:32 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How sweet of you badmedicine to remember my ankle! I have struggled with my physical limitations, but the worry was wasted. (as it usually is, right?)

It all turned out fine, and besides having a little pain from "over doing" with the celebrations, it was pretty awesome all around.

I know I will sleep well tonight!


Me: 43, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 12 DS 9
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5290 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
ChoosingHope
♀ Member
Member # 33606
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

AWESOME, Care!!! And glad your ankle is feeling better!! I loved every line of your post!!

I had a great Christmas too. He had the kids yesterday, and I had seven invitations to join friends for dinner. I turned them all down and went Christmas shopping all day and visited a sick relative. Then cooking, wrapping, packing before my kiddies arrived home. Today - up to my family's home and we had such a calm, happy, social joyful day. My kids are over the moon.

What a difference two years makes - and thank you Care for always always being such a mentor to me (and many others)!!!


Posts: 1425 | Registered: Oct 2011
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 10:19 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Merry Christmas, Hope. I am glad your day was peaceful and that you did what felt right to you. Best gift of the day that message!!

I appreciate the "mentor" comment, but as it was pointed out, just last week I was a whining mess!! Proof that the roller coaster still rides, that SI is a blessing, and that we don't survive alone.

If one week can bring me from there to here, then please! If you are having the worst holiday ever, give it time!!!

I still hurt, (in my back and ankle. My heart is pretty well healed) but my attitude about the hurting is completely adjusted.

Blessings to all.


Me: 43, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 12 DS 9
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5290 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
FaithFool
♀ Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 10:24 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

*like*


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
Celebrating 60 years on Earth

Posts: 16626 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
gahurts
♂ Member
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 12:15 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awesome caregiver, just awesome!


"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie


Posts: 3070 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
Griefstricken25
♀ Member
Member # 29183
Default  Posted: 12:22 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You rock, caregiver!


Me!
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011

Posts: 2498 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: A better place
IrishLass518
♀ Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 12:28 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ya done good CG, ya done good.


Me: 45 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 22, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 11
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1470 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
sadtoo
♀ Member
Member # 2027
Default  Posted: 1:03 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love this!


It is what it is, not what we hope it can be.

When another woman takes your husband,
sometimes the best thing you can do for
yourself is to LET HER HAVE the worthless
bum.
OC born 2001
Divorced 2003
Remarried 2008 (New Guy)


Posts: 7926 | Registered: Aug 2003 | From: Iowa
DeadMumWalking
♀ Member
Member # 25341
Default  Posted: 3:47 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Way to have a Merry Christmas!! Stretch is such an idiot for not appreciating his children. You have come such a long way!

((((cg & kids))))


Me (BS), Him (WH): early 50's
3 DS: teens!!! :)
M: 24 (19 1/2 at Dday), Together 29
Dday: Dec 2008
re-separated (in-house), for good (??) <-- should really remove these, shouldn't I...

Posts: 2503 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: EU
Topic Posts: 27
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