I've had three different things come at me lately from literally out of nowhere. One is a work-related thing, another is utter stupidity on Ex#1's part that long story short got me served with papers (the state Atty General is suing me for child support because they think I've not paid him any CS since the boys moved in with him. Luckily for me I'm an accountant and retentive about files and receipts so I can prove otherwise). The third is more BS and drama from STBX.
Jay and I happened to be talking each time I got broadsided with these things. And each time he's been able to talk me down/through it, not ONCE making me feel stupid or like my feelings aren't valid. He listens, and he gets it. He just gets it without me having to explain.
STBX was the KING of that, of running me down. I didn't realize how much STBX would use my trying to open up to him about stuff as a conduit to crush my spirit. I used to get told 'suck it up buttercup'. a LOT. Or told I was overreacting/being silly. Most of the time I didn't even realize he was doing it. Until now. Or he'd do the whole KISA and start bombarding me with 'if it were me, i'd do this' when I didn't need him to fix it. just needed him to LISTEN and be oh, I don't know, EMPATHIC, maybe??
But Jay does exactly that. He some intuitively knows what to say and not say and he just...gets me. It's just the way he's wired. And it is SO refreshing.Me: BS (43)Him: EX, aka "The Dink"(50)
D-Day#1 12/22/11. D-Day#2 5/23/2013.
Divorce final 2/10/14.
Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack.