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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Having neurosurgery dec 20th
Sarah1106
♀ Member
Member # 29194
Default  Posted: 8:44 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm not sure were to put this but I definitely need some support. I have a left accoustic neuroma that a neurosurgeon will attempt to remove. The good news is that it is not cancer. The bad news is that given where the tumor is I have a 50-70% chance of losing functional hearing in my left ear and may have balance deficits that will require months of PT. And what's really hard given my type a personality - is that so much of it will require a "wait and see approach" -I have a 6yo and 4 yo so I need to be able to plan some stuff out. My ex is a physician and somehow this always helped me feel calmer My parents are coming for the surgery as is my sister who is a nurse I just can't seem to locate that fight to feel like I'm going to come through the other side of this ok

Posts: 127 | Registered: Jul 2010
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:48 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sarah - Sending you strength and comfort in the days leading up to the surgery, and mojo for a swift and full recovery afterward.

You can do this, honey. ((((hugs))))


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
devistatedmom
♀ Member
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 8:49 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You can do this Sarah. You know what you have, you know the good, and the bad. You know the chances of the good and bad happening, and it sounds like you have a lot of support. I don't know what your relationship is like with your XH, but I'm thinking him, along with your sister will use their medical knowledge to make sure you get the best possible outcome.

I know it's hard, but try not to buy trouble. You don't know the "worse case" is going to happen. You could get best case. The kids are going to be looked after with your parents there, and you are going to get through this! We are all here behind you!


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5524 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
phmh
♀ Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You're going to be OK.

I know this sounds so hokey, but attitude is so important. I know it's so scary, but believe that you'll come through it.

Please update us -- looking forward to hearing a positive result!

Sending you huge hugs. (((Sarah)))


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny


Posts: 3406 | Registered: Dec 2011
IrishLass518
♀ Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sarah))) you are stronger than you know and braver than you think. Keep the best case options in the forefront of your mind.


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
careerlady
♀ Member
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 10:39 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sure you will do great, most people with this condition don't have any long lasting problems once it is taken out (I'm a physician but not sleazy like your ex lol)


Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI

Posts: 942 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
ArkLaMiss
♀ Member
Member # 14918
Default  Posted: 11:46 PM, December 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Huge well wishes and hope you have a speedy recovery. Just know that 40+ thousand people are sending powerful SI mojo and are very much surrounding you and holding you up as you go through this.
God speed, Sarah. Keep us updated.


Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

Posts: 1203 | Registered: Jun 2007
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 12:26 AM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I can only imagine how scary this must be to be facing. Especially being responsible for two young children. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please keep us updated on your healing.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 918 | Registered: Mar 2013
JerseyCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 41441
Default  Posted: 6:42 AM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope you see this post
I found I too had a brain tumor requiring surgery. 18 months out of work. Loss of vision and balance and possible hemorrhage leading to possible death where the tumor was located...that was when my exWH started the divorce leaving me with no insurance so surgery went out the window and I waited for my death.
I looked into experiment treatments. Two years ago I found 4 hospitals in the country (now I'm sure there are more) doing wonderful treatments with laser and radiation. Please get one more opinion if you have time...these places sponsored by the Mayo clinic. I went to Robert Wood University in NJ and there were others in Minnesota. Jacksonville. Phoenix. Please try they are doing amazing things with tumors MS and much motr more


Me: Divorced 2012
I know that when I truly love & honor myself I am at my best & most complete; and I will never settle for anything less from myself or from anyone else ever again!

Posts: 336 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Have not decided where to land yet!
tesla
♀ Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 7:03 AM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Sarah))))
You can do this.
Thinking about you and sending mojo.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4684 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Vulcanized
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 2:35 PM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sarah)))

I'm glad you'll have family to help support you. You have the thoughts and prayers of us here.


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 764 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
solus sto
♀ Member
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 5:20 PM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Sarah))) I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. December 20 is a good day for girls who put up a good fight; it's the day I was born, very early, in an era when preemies did not fare well. I think you're a tough cookie like me. You'll fight, too.

I understand how "wait and see" can be touch." It's difficult for me, too--especially since I now feel as though I wasted a huge chunk of my life waiting and seeing--only to be shown how foolish that was.

But you will do fine. I just know it.

You have all of us pulling for you.


BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 53, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
DIVORCING
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 8841 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
Sarah1106
♀ Member
Member # 29194
Default  Posted: 6:19 PM, December 8th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you so much for the support, kind words, and prayers. They truly make me feel supported. I did a ton of research and met with three different nuerosurgery teams before deciding to go with one, so, I am confidant I will be getting state of the art care. And, in all likelihood, most of the side effects with balance and dizziness can be worked through with a few months of pt. Plenty of people have partial to full hearing loss in one ear and it doesn't impact their day to day lives

I don't want people to jump on me because I agree that having that grit, that instinct that you r going to make it through this is essential. And I just don't have it. I have sat down a few times to write a just in case letter to the kids but always end up crying. So, it's not that I want to die -I am just so down and beat up. My x picked Friday to send me a settlement agreement that did not have any facts correct (come on lawyer, u should look at the 16c statement to see what my income is and you'll see it's $11k less than your client claimed). Just overwhelmed


Posts: 127 | Registered: Jul 2010
Topic Posts: 13

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