I am so sorry you got to that point.
I would say the anger you're feeling at 3 yrs out is normal. I know how I felt at that time. I think that's because you're a little further out and seeing things with a slightly different perspective. I know it was like that for me, anyway.
Sending you strength to get though this tough time.
Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Him - (Doesn't matter)
D-Day June 12th 2008, D-Day #2 Sept 28th
D-Day #3 Feb 15th & 16th 2010, D-Day #4 Nov 29th 2010