Oh my dear Shelly - keep that seatbelt fastened and enjoy the ride
I have three grandchildren - ages 4 (boy), 23 months (girl) and 11 months (girl).
Those girls are going to give this Granny a heart attack...LOL.
23 month old has always been a firecracker - willful and spirited...and now her favorite thing is to SCREAM (even when happy). And NO is her favorite word, "NO, Mee-Maw!!" "NO Mommy!!" etc., etc., ad nauseum...even if she means yes. Funny thing...that curse we impart upon our children ("Wait until you have your own kids...") - it works - GD 23 months is Just. Like. Her. Mother. BUT...it trickles down to me because I am her 3rd favorite person (after mommy & daddy) and since she's so comfortable with me, her true colors show. But on the other side of the coin, she is snuggly, affectionate, smart as hell (she already recognizes every letter in the alphabet and can count to 20). I frankly think when she has these meltdowns she's overstimulated, tired, or hungry. The willfulness is just because she's too damned smart for her own (or our own) good and she gets ahead of herself and gets frustrated. And she wants what she wants!
The 11-month-old GD is learning quickly and I can clearly see when the smoke clears from the older GD, this one will take over.
My grandson was/is just the most laid-back, easy -going kid ever. That's why his mom had another one (lol) and why his aunt (my other DD) had one (double lol). It's not 100% true that girls are more challenging in the "spirited" arena, but I do think they do come with extra drama...and they know how to use it.
You're doing great, Shel...it's exhausting, I know all too well. I read your post and it was deja vu for my DD at her age and now my GD. Good times.
Hang in there...if I remember correctly, my spirited DD became much easier at around 4.
edited for spelling