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User Topic: How old was your WS when they cheated?
Abbondad
♂ Member
Member # 37898
Default  Posted: 9:25 PM, November 1st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

From 39 to 40. Could that BE any more cliche??!!

Yep. I remember it clearly: she'd literally just turned 39, and she said giddily to me, "Something's happened to me. I feel like I am 17 again!"

Started scorning my "old" music, wanted only to listen to contemporary empty pop, hung out with a younger crowd from work, talked about traveling to exotic, exciting places, started getting compulsively into sexually exhibitionistic behavior on internet web cams...

At first I thought it was endearing: aw...you're going through a little mid-life crisis!

And then she destroyed our family remorselessly.


Divorced April Fool's Day 2014

Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
-Dune


Posts: 1456 | Registered: Dec 2012
Want To Wake Up
♀ Member
Member # 31583
Default  Posted: 2:47 AM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Him 47yrs (3 weeks from 48th birthday)
OW (2 prostitutes in a threesome... now that's a CLICHE!) 1 was 23ish 1 was... God, I just hope she was OVER 18! (can't tell from the photos, she's wearing wayyy too much makeup but she looks very YOUNG)

Him 48
OW... EA/PA (kissing) 32yrs

Him still 48
OW... 42-44ish (don't know how to catergorise this one... I call her "near miss")

Him 47-48
OW... EA's...or just highly inappropriate "friendships"... all of them were somewhere from very early 20's to early 30's


Me 50+
WH 50+ (SlowUptake)
DDay '09
"He didn't cheat because I wasn't enough, he cheated because HE wasn't enough"

"Unhappy marriages don't cause infidelity. Being unfaithful causes infidelity."


Posts: 455 | Registered: Mar 2011
blue8888
♀ New Member
Member # 40896
Default  Posted: 8:09 AM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Spread out through most of our entire 13 yr relationship (11 yrs married) so the cheating started when he was 17 or 18 and he is now 29. The newest OW is 19 and he is obsessed with her.

He also seems to think he is 19 again as he is listening to Kate Perry and Miley Cyrus music now when he never liked pop music. So weird.

[This message edited by blue8888 at 8:11 AM, November 2nd (Saturday)]


Me- BW 31, WH- 29
M 11 yrs Together 13
2 kids (special needs)
Last Dday 9/26/13 EA w/ 19 yr old OW, too many prior EAs to list, one he kissed
Divorcing
My value hasn't decreased based on his inability to see my worth.

Posts: 38 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: United States
hurtsobadinside
♂ Member
Member # 35308
Default  Posted: 8:36 AM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She was 46 maybe 49 (??) to 57

me: 59
her WW- 58
7 yr LTA (PA & EA-maybe 10yrs?) with her former boss
one d-24 yrs old
married 25 yrs
in "R"
and its been roller-coaster
D-day 3-13-12
confronted 6 wks later
I did contact AP's faithful spouse
True NC- July 2012
Fog, denials, blame shifting, rub sweeping, TT you name it and she did it but things are finally getting better very slowly
its a long road....and painful


Posts: 151 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Illinois
painfulpast
♀ Member
Member # 41038
Default  Posted: 8:38 AM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

37 - a little early for a midlife crisis?


Don't water the plants - they're plastic

Posts: 1261 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: East Coast
FightingBack
♀ Member
Member # 34770
Default  Posted: 9:05 AM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Has anyone analyzed the stats on this question?


Me 53
WH 58
Married 25 years
4 children S30,D24, S23,S21
D-Day Nov. 29, 2011
15 year affair with married employee.
Together trying to make sense of it all!

Posts: 658 | Registered: Feb 2012
Dreamland
♀ Member
Member # 40488
Default  Posted: 12:05 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He was 46 and she was 25


Me-BS 50 Him-WH 47, DD17
Together since 1993, Married 19 yrs
DDay 3/12,4/12,7/12 EA-PA OW - 25 single husband chasing bastard whore

Posts: 515 | Registered: Aug 2013
IrishLass518
♀ Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 12:09 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

39


Me: 45 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 22, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 11
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1465 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Girlietoo
♀ Member
Member # 38719
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WH47
OW23

Although he also went through a major mid-life crisis at 40. He didn't cheat tho.


Me- 40
Him- 47
March 9, 2013- the day my heart died

Posts: 190 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Canada
heforgotme
♀ Member
Member # 38391
Default  Posted: 12:35 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

47


D-Day 11/15/12
5 month PA
Married 20 years, 3 kids
All good is hard. All evil is easy. Dying, losing, cheating, and mediocrity is easy. Stay away from easy.
- Scott Alexander
It was the day I thought I'd never get through - Daughtry

Posts: 1035 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: FL
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 12:38 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Abbondad, I was married to the male version of that. It happened when he turned 40.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1159 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
LadyLove
♀ Member
Member # 40664
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WS - 46
OW - 45


BW - 46 (me)
WH - 48 Ladyslove
Don't know if I can live with it.

Posts: 61 | Registered: Sep 2013
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 1:33 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The Big Four-Oh. Apparently Two-Oh and single sounded much more appealing to her than 40 and married, so she pretended to be that for about a year.

She just turned 42 and is sort of acting like a married adult again. I think...


Me-45
WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 10 month PA/EA
Final NC late Feb. '13
M - 18 years, together 19+
4 children

Reconciled


Posts: 1024 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
BryanP37
♂ New Member
Member # 39685
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She was 32 when her fling cooked up on Black Friday last year. Was caught on her 33rd birthday last February by the other BS who was her BFF at the time. I didn't find out about it for another 2 month. Figured heavily on my decision to divorce her.


BS: Me-38
XWS: Her-34
Married 7 yrs, together 9 years-No kids
Ex had 4 month PA with her best friends husband. Other flings early in marriage confessed during discovery.
Divorce final 6-25-2013.
Carefully reconciling after divorce. 10/2013

Posts: 25 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Texas
TheAmazingWondertwin
♀ Member
Member # 40769
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

35.
OW was the same.


Everyday is a new day, some good, some bad.
Me- BS 39
Him- FWS
14 years- 2 middle school children
DDay- 07-24-2013
NC broken from August 6- 24, 2013
Avalanche of Truth on November 14, 2013
Length of A: June 10th to Dday- with broken NC

Posts: 470 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: East Coast
HeartbrokenDude
♂ Member
Member # 41110
Default  Posted: 2:56 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

39. She had a midlife crisis that damaged me for life and almost ruined our family.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: United States
Itstoohard
♀ Member
Member # 37629
Default  Posted: 3:48 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. Lots of MLC! And now we have 50 is the new 40! Here comes more s**t storms.


BS 64
fWH 64
PA 22 yrs ago
Started as EA for 2 yrs then ONS CORRECTION Started as an EA for 8 years
Trustismyissue

Posts: 150 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: US
Laura28
♀ Member
Member # 28997
Default  Posted: 4:06 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. This is such a hard question.

I suspect he started before we married (31 years ago) when he was about 28 but KNOW he started 27 years ago - he would have been about 32 then I guess.

Then he didn't stop right up until he was 56. (Multiple LTAs and probably others)

Sorry FB I guess that really stuffs up the stats

[This message edited by Laura28 at 4:07 PM, November 2nd (Saturday)]


Married 30yrs Me BW 57Yrs Him FWH 59yrs
OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted.
Dday May 28 2010.
OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA til dday).
OW2 2002(8yrs PA).
OW3 2009(1Yr PA).
Others???? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck the goat"

Posts: 2726 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Australia
deeplysad
♀ Member
Member # 16590
Default  Posted: 4:20 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He was 52 and his whore was around 41.

He had a good job and a nice expense account. She was trash that lived a trashy life. She worked REALLY hard to get him to leave me and give her the kind of life she had only dreamed about.


Me: BW - I'm much too young to feel this damn old
Him: FWH - Midlife crisis with a pathetic porn wannabe
D-Day: August 2004; Lots of false R until February 2005.

It takes all kinds of kinds....Miranda Lambert


Posts: 3176 | Registered: Oct 2007 | From: So Calif
LifeIsBroken
♀ Member
Member # 27071
Default  Posted: 4:51 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Him / 60 Me / 59
MOW / 50

Their sexting began on our 35th wedding anniv. Her bs had bought her DD implants on her 40th. She was proud of them & sent lots of photos. XH proposed to her 3 weeks after sexting began; guess he forgot he was already married.


Actions ALWAYS have consequences. Too bad cheaters don't consider the consequences BEFORE they create so much damage.

Posts: 355 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Massachusetts
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