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User Topic: Things in my purse
myperfectlife
♀ Member
Member # 39801
Default  Posted: 12:24 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As a mom of 3 boys I always have some crazy things in my purse, but I realized the other day just how stupid and insane my life is when I saw these things that I NEVER thought I would have in my purse-for reasons I NEVER thought I would have them.

Prozac (to keep me sane)
Binoculars (yes, I sank this low once)
Unsigned final divorce papers
Loan papers for the house I am buying without my WS
Appointment cards for my IC with weekly appointments
New bank card from separating my finances from WS
Print out with thread from SI to validate that, despite all the crazy things in my purse- *I* am not crazy.



I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13

Posts: 452 | Registered: Jul 2013
Junebug0525
♀ Member
Member # 29142
Default  Posted: 12:30 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You should go to the store, buy one small item that REALLY makes you smile. Keep that with you.


Me: BS
Him: WXH DDay-11/22/2009~ D~ 10/25/10
OWhore: Co-worker (7 years younger)
"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together." AND THEY DID!!!

Posts: 1141 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Maryland
PinkJeepLady
♀ Member
Member # 37575
Default  Posted: 1:58 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are speaking to my heart, I love purses! I too have sons, so hear you there!
Isn't it so true that what is inside is a reflection of what are life is at the moment? I have high blood pressure meds, MC and IC cards, WH passwords and a small journal that I like to call "the book of joy/hate".
I have to say I am a lipstick junky and carry about 6 tubes at all times, you just never know. I have a hot pink one just reserved for jeep riding.
I am also famous for my lists and sticky notes. Somehow I have created my own "system" with them that actually works for me. I sort of reshuffle them at the end of the day and then am able to plan what needs to be done for the next day.
I do have a tip for you. When your purse becomes cluttered, full and too heavy, just get a new one out! Take out the absolute essentials, don't forget the drivers license and maybe one tube of lipstick, and put the loaded down purse in the closet for awhile. Trust me, it will still be there for you. Start your day out fresh with your lighter bag. When you feel like it, revisit the full one and purge/keep what you want. Sometimes I will have two cluttered bags in the closet. I also have a weekend bag verses a working bag. I don't like to dwell on work stuff on my days off.
Junebug is so right, put in something that will make you smile and validate who you are. Just watch the chocolate, I have sadly had to scrape out melted Godiva before, you don't want to waste good chocolate. You don't need to go get a bunch of Coach bags, unless you can afford it. I find great bags everywhere. I had this one I got right before DDAY and when I went to use it again, I realized it reminded me of that crazy time so I donated it. Hopefully no bad karma went with it.
You are not crazy at all, it sounds to me like you are on the road to a new and exciting life with those awesome sons! I don't know how old your sons are, but let me tell you that it is amazing to see them grow up and be good men. Even though they are on their own with families they seem to still need their mom now and then, it's great!
Take care!


Me: BW-54. Him-FWH 54. DDay June 1st 2012 cheating with prostitutes overseas
R-ing
"Not everything that counts is counted. Not everything that is counted counts." Albert Einstein

Posts: 484 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Out West
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 3:22 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

myperfectlife,

I have binoculars in my purse too. And I don't think it's sinking low to use them. Trust but verify, right? I need them to see license plates from a distance, among other things.

We should all really start a PI business with our new found skills.


together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1390 | Registered: Dec 2012
PinkJeepLady
♀ Member
Member # 37575
Default  Posted: 3:43 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Seriously, with a line of "spy purses".
Hidden mics, binoculars, key loggers, hmmm...
I have learned a lot about how to retrieve deleted data, hidden accounts, hidden contacts, ect.
Now I know good old fashioned binoculars work for some! You can always say you are birdwatching?


Me: BW-54. Him-FWH 54. DDay June 1st 2012 cheating with prostitutes overseas
R-ing
"Not everything that counts is counted. Not everything that is counted counts." Albert Einstein

Posts: 484 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Out West
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 4:47 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The only kind of bird I am watching is a vulture.

Would love to go into the spy purse business tho.
Don't forget the disguises tho----need them for stake-outs.

If you haven't already, read the 00Lucy thread in the investigative tips forum---it is hysterical!(the title of the thread is "Snagged")
Seriously tho, I have done stake-outs, kind of in disguise, & in a borrowed non-descript car. That's the only way I first got a good look @ OW----I really HAD to know what she looked like.
After that, stake outs ( on my day off) were the only way that I caught WH & OW together, more than once, after Dday, even tho WH claimed there was NC.
It's really something---tragic, & crazy in fact -----that it got to that point that I had to spy on my WH of 23 yrs & father of my 4 children

[This message edited by mchercheur at 4:54 PM, October 26th (Saturday)]


together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1390 | Registered: Dec 2012
Spelljean
♀ Member
Member # 35624
Default  Posted: 6:38 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love that...spy purse.

I bet all of our purses....or for the men, maybe their car compartments or backpacks, reflect where we are in the process!

I do carry Xanax now, some new spare keys I just had made for me and DDs new downtown apartment, shopping lists of things to buy for new apartment, a screwdriver for setting up new apt, and for removing items from walls of old apt, lease, chapstick and Advil!


WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

Posts: 903 | Registered: May 2012 | From: California
myperfectlife
♀ Member
Member # 39801
Default  Posted: 7:35 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pink Jeep Lady...
I do have a tip for you. When your purse becomes cluttered, full and too heavy, just get a new one out! Take out the absolute essentials, don't forget the drivers license and maybe one tube of lipstick, and put the loaded down purse in the closet for awhile. Trust me, it will still be there for you

^^^ I do this already!! haha...and I am the same way with sticky notes. At work I used the "super sticky" and I leave a note for my assistant that says "DON'T USE THESE!"

Since it looks like my WS and I will be signing divorce papers tomorrow, I guess I won't need the binoculars anymore. He doesn't even know that I have them.
Life shouldn't be this way you know?
Time to get out my fancy lipstick and move on.


I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13

Posts: 452 | Registered: Jul 2013
PinkJeepLady
♀ Member
Member # 37575
Default  Posted: 9:02 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree, like should not be like this!! Amen to that. None of us should have to be checking up and spying on our partners.
I am sorry about the divorce. It sucks for sure.
However, I think it might be wise to keep those binoc's in your purse because you my friend are about to embark on a new adventure. You may need to do some scouting at some point,
I wish you strength as you sign and to feel a bit of peace as you go forward!
Thanks for the thread tip mc, love it!


Me: BW-54. Him-FWH 54. DDay June 1st 2012 cheating with prostitutes overseas
R-ing
"Not everything that counts is counted. Not everything that is counted counts." Albert Einstein

Posts: 484 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Out West
emotionalgirl
♀ Member
Member # 40184
Default  Posted: 9:47 PM, October 26th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG I am LMAO ....I am totally OCD about everything, my house my office you name it, but I have a major problem with purses. I can't keep them clean and hate cleaning them out, so I have an entire shelf in a closet full of purses. They are all organized on the outside but every single one of the, is full to the brim with crap! I never said I was sane or even normal!


1st D day: Saturday July 20,2013
2nd D day....when the s**t really hit the fan and the truth came out.Saturday August 3,2013
3rd D day: Friday August 16, 2013...NC sent Friday Aug 30 4th D day NOV 11
Me: BS
Him: WH
Married 25 years....finally in R

Posts: 373 | Registered: Aug 2013
LonelySilhouette
♀ Member
Member # 39502
Default  Posted: 10:27 AM, October 27th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am carrying around 10 years worth of income tax reports showing how much money wh made, along with statements from all of our investments and a list of financial "concerns" I would have in case of an actual split. This was all stuff I took to the lawyer when I went to learn about my rights. Oh, and a copy of the e-mail that outed his "activities".


Me - 49 (BS)
Him - 51 (WH with "8 or 9" prostitutes)
Married 30 years, give or take a few weeks here and there
D-Day - May 4, 2013
Discovered an EA going on since 2010 around that time, too. NC in place now.


Posts: 88 | Registered: Jun 2013
Celticlass
♀ Member
Member # 39518
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, October 27th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so glad that you started this thread, myperfectlife. I feel much more normal now I too have my handbags stuffed full of papers and receipts that get left behind when I change purses.

I have my old apartment lease (should have removed this months ago ), 6 or 7 lipsticks, acid reflux meds,ADs(can't imagine why I would need those ), notebook full of random stuff--I too have a system of lists, secret sticky note addiction & colored pens that seems crazy to anyone else but works for me.

I often wonder what an anthropolgist from the future would glean from excavating an intact handbag from one of us.




Posts: 72 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Lone Star State
myperfectlife
♀ Member
Member # 39801
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, October 27th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

All of this just reminded me that I have a few purses at my old house I need to grab.
...and I told WS tonight that I have binoculars in my purse.
The look on his face...


I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13

Posts: 452 | Registered: Jul 2013
Gemini71
♀ Member
Member # 40115
Default  Posted: 12:13 AM, October 28th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've been carrying around a computer disc with files from my STBX's computer showing more of him and the OWs than I ever want to see again! I don't want to destroy it until the D is final in case I need it, I don't want to lose it, but I don't want to leave it lying around for the kids to find. So I travel with my own personal 'porn from hell' stash. So binoculars sound pretty tame to me.


Edited to correct stupid typos.

Two steps forward and one step backwards, is still progress.


Posts: 1764 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 12:56 AM, October 28th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My various items quickly outgrew my purse...now my car holds all of my stuff that is MINE..private, none of his biz. My journal, my notes, all of it. Funny when he asks to use my car, takes me 30 minutes to haul my shit to another location..he's a bigger snooper than I am.

[This message edited by Ostrich80 at 12:57 AM, October 28th (Monday)]


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5039 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
Topic Posts: 15

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