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User Topic: Wife lies to me!
Quarterback
♂ New Member
Member # 41071
Default  Posted: 10:52 PM, October 21st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Quadruple bypass 5 months ago. Married 5years. 69 years old. Single 21 years. Can't call wife, when she is traveling/visiting up North because stepdaughter goes insane. Wife never calls to see if I'm doing OK. Had to pay for stepdaughters rehersal dinner and honeymoon. His Father paid for nothing, didn't give them a wedding present and stepdaughter does everything she can to put my wife and him together. Wife babysits stepdaughters children and stepdaughter arranges for him, not including his wife, to come over for two or three days to keep her company and relieve her if she gets tired. In a 24 hour day, my wife can't take two minutes to call, no charge, and ask....Are you OK...Bye. I bought her a cell phone and great plan but she will not take it with her. I'm not really puzzled about this....just like to hear some different input, other than hers/wife!!

Posts: 2 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Florida
Kalliopeia
♀ Member
Member # 35053
Default  Posted: 11:44 PM, October 21st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

stop paying for anything and see how fast she calls.

Posts: 478 | Registered: Mar 2012
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 11:51 PM, October 21st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So you had quadruple bypass surgery 5 months ago. And it sounds like your wife's daughter has just gotten married and your wife has traveled up North for the wedding? And you are thinking that your stepdaughter is manipulating the situation to get her mom (your wife) and her dad (your wife's x) alone together?

just like to hear some different input, other than hers/wife!!

What type of input is your wife giving you?

Should your wife be calling you? Yes. What are you concerned is happening?


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7683 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Hope2B
♀ Member
Member # 40474
Default  Posted: 11:55 PM, October 21st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope you have a full recovery from your quadruple bypass, but I can tell from your profile story that you're not happy.

My wife will not travel, wears sweatpants, sweat shirts in winter and shorts, tennis shoes, and 25 year old tee shirts with brand new shirts in the bag on the closet shelves.
Would it help, perhaps, to plan a nice date with her, to a restaurant that is a bit more dressy than family-casual? Or perhaps to have a surprise "Wife Day" and take her out to the movies or maybe you can book a "couples massage" or something out of the norm? Might she enjoy that?

She will work out in the summer heat of 90-94 degrees, sweat like a mule, smell like a hog, climb up in the bed at night, go to sleep without taking a bath. It's repulsive to me and I have asked her to at least rinse off and she tells me to STFU!!
Well, there is something not quite right here. I understand being repulsed by body-sweat smells, but is there a reason why she doesn't bathe after a day like that? Does she normally bathe frequently enough so as not to have offensive body odor? Often, people with body odor don't notice their own smell.

stepdaughter goes insane....she is gone to her daughter's to visit for the eleventh time this year, and she never calls to see if I'm OK.
This behavior is telling you something. Does she rely on you for financial support or ?? This is a really different family dynamic, and it apparently works for her and it seems like you aren't included in their lives.

Why is she so inconsiderate of me and shows no compassion for me ever!
I'm afraid she is inconsiderate because she just doesn't care and probably doesn't feel love for you. I am so sorry, and I know it hurts!

We mix like oil and water. We have never consummated our marriage
Then why on earth did you marry? And why are you staying in a situation that could easily be annulled?

she has never cooked one meal. I do all the cooking, if we don't eat out, just about every day.
Please understand that just because someone is of the female gender, it does NOT mean that we cook. You feel your wife is lying to you, you might be correct, all things in this "relationship" considered.

The question is, what, if anything, will you do about being in a marriage for 5 years that has never been consummated, and you're with a woman who doesn't seem to care for you??


Me: early 60s
Him: 65 yrs old, LTA w/a pro$titute
Married since 1980, no children
DDay: Feb. 25, 2013
Trickle Truth Days: Sept 10, 11, 13, 15 (2013)
His affair--says it was only 8 times 1x/mo, then found out it was 7 YEARS 2-3x/mo

Posts: 342 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: out west/west coast U.S.A.
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 11:58 PM, October 21st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How old is your wife?


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7683 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Crushed1
♀ Member
Member # 6449
Default  Posted: 12:13 AM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Quarterback, welcome. I'm sorry for your pain and hope you are recovering from your major surgery from a few months ago.

I read your profile and the way your W and stepdaughter treat you so callously, why do you put up with that kind of treatment?

Do you think your wife is involved in infidelity? I'm sorry, but it's not clear to me by your post.


~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
~STRENGTH~PEACE~HOPE~FAITH

Posts: 9649 | Registered: Feb 2005 | From: Texas
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 4:33 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't see any mention of infidelity, and recovering from infidelity is SI's focus. We're only tangentially involved with improving Ms.

I've got to say, my thoughts are similar to Hope2b's - what are you willing to do about being in a marriage with a woman who doesn't seem to care for you and who repulses you?

I'm really sorry you're in this situation, but you're the only one who can make your life better.


fBH (me) - 65+, fWW (her) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 9740 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
Hope2B
♀ Member
Member # 40474
Default  Posted: 5:22 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

PM coming at ya.


Me: early 60s
Him: 65 yrs old, LTA w/a pro$titute
Married since 1980, no children
DDay: Feb. 25, 2013
Trickle Truth Days: Sept 10, 11, 13, 15 (2013)
His affair--says it was only 8 times 1x/mo, then found out it was 7 YEARS 2-3x/mo

Posts: 342 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: out west/west coast U.S.A.
DefeatedDad
♂ Member
Member # 41026
Default  Posted: 6:15 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd dump this woman like an old refrigerator.

She obviously must have been raised in a barn. What about her is positive?

Quit giving her and the daughter money. Shut off the supply.


Me - BS 46
Wife - WS 44
Son 13, Daughter 17
Married 22 years
D-day May 16, 2012
TT D-Day 2 9/25/17
TT D-Day 3 1/02/14

Divorcing her sorry a--.


Posts: 217 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: New Mexico
Truly
♀ Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Sorry, Quaterback,

This doesn't sound like a relationship at all, let alone a marriage. There appear to be at least 3 people in this marriage and none of them are you.

Horrible question alert:
Did she marry you for money?

Cos I am not seeing the love.

You sound in great emotional pain, but I think you can make it stop, when you're ready x


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 257 | Registered: Sep 2013
Thinkingtoomuch
♀ Member
Member # 31765
Default  Posted: 9:08 AM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree with the others. She's apparently not in the marriage. You've only been married with her for 5 years? It can take at least a couple years to see the real person under the initial honeymoon phase.

How does she act to you otherwise when she's home? You do everything? It would upset me also if ws never called me when out of town. Actually everything you mentioned sounded like she's not there for you at all.

You absolutely deserve much better than this.

Good luck Quarterback.

[This message edited by Thinkingtoomuch at 9:13 AM, October 23rd (Wednesday)]


Posts: 747 | Registered: Apr 2011
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 10:21 AM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry QB, you are being used as a meal ticket. Clearly she has no love for you. I am sorry.

Please see the truth that is staring you in the face, and see a lawyer NOW. Protect your assets.

I am so so sorry.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7021 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
Topic Posts: 12

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