You could decide to value, enjoy, and be proud of your body as you are. I know it's easier said than done, but I wanted to offer this approach. Really, you are enough now; you've always been enough in the past, you always will be enough.
If you go for it, though, I hope you get everything positive that you want.
[This message edited by sisoon at 9:49 AM, October 22nd (Tuesday)]
Unlike some here, I believe that it is not just your body, it is his too. Just like his body is not just his, but yours too. What he does with his body (such as: Affair), effects you and you have a say in how he treats, uses, cares for it. The same would be true for you and your body. "The two will become one flesh" could be interpreted this way.
And by the way, even though I didn't want the augmentation, they are really, really, beautiful to look at. And it hasn't kept me from wanting to touch them either.
The only person's opinion that truly matters, is yours.
I would like some cosmetic procedures (not a boob job) and my H is very much against it. So far, that is enough to keep me from doing it.
Just like tattoos. Often that comes up o these forums and the attitude seems to be to hell with what your spouse thinks, if you want it, get it.
I just think if you love someone, what they think about just about everything should matter, and in some cases even sway your your actions and decisions to their way.
Both of us love them! They look and feel natural. I have more confidence naked (and with an empty nest there is a lot of running around the house naked!), in a bathing suit or athletic top. Plus they are more fun in bed, IMHO.
So, thumbs up from me!
me (WW/BS): 48
4 kiddos in mid 20's
Me: I didn't sign up for this.
Him: you're already in this. All you can do is resign...
Under the muscle for sure!
This was done 11 years ago and they are still where they should be. Fwh infidelities were all years before this and I didn't even know about it, so that had nothing to do with my choice.
Healing myself is now my top priority.
If my husband wanted to get a tattoo I wouldn't care.
That is how I feel about someone getting cosmetic surgery if their spouse is against it too. It is great for those who have a spouse that doesn't care either way. But if he does care and doesn't want you to do it, and you do love him/her, then yes I think it should be part of the overall decision.
Thanks for posting this. I have always been uncomfortable with my boobs. I really don't like them and never had long before dday.
FWH says it doesn't matter to him. But his OWs all had MUCH bigger boobs than me.
I agree with those who say it should be about what each woman wants and shouldn't be about the OWs. Not do I believe it should be about the H. I would never have them done for my FWH (before or after dday). In fact if he ASKED me to get them done I would probably be livid.
Having said all that, I read so often on here about women working to rebuild their self esteem and this often includes self-soothing by losing weight, redoing the hair, makeup, clothes etc. I did those things after dday and they really did make me feel so much better. I guess that sounds a little shallow but I truly believe these things help.
So why not a boob job??
It has been in the back of my mind for quite a while now. So maybe.
Anyway thanks again to letitout and all those other ladies who have shared their thoughts and most importantly their experiences. Thanks too to the Menz who have shared. It's great to hear from you too.