And are you committed to R now? What's different? What do you plan to do to show her that it isn't the same old same old?
What will be different this time that is the real stuff, instead of the 'just enough' to string her along, as you've been doing?
(Not attacking or judging, real questions that you don't have to answer here---just for you to think about )Take up your space (and do it well).
"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."