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User Topic: How many of you told your children years after?
Junebug0525
♀ Member
Member # 29142
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, October 8th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My son is 10. He was 6 when XH and I separated. DS doesn't ask questions yet, but I'm wondering if he will ask what happened in the future. If so, what do I say? XH and I get along really well now and have an awesome co-parenting relationship, which is a surprise if you read my profile and while I refuse to lie to my son, I don't want to damage the relationship that XH and I have regarding him. It's much easier when we get along. Did any of you separate when your kids were small and when they got older had to explain what happened?


Me: BS
Him: WXH DDay-11/22/2009~ D~ 10/25/10
OWhore: Co-worker (7 years younger)
"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together." AND THEY DID!!!

Posts: 1141 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Maryland
EvenKeel
♀ Member
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 2:30 PM, October 8th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have waiting for four years now and my children (17 and 12) have never asked.

If/when asked, I decided I will tell them their father was unfaithful. I really do not foresee this question coming up until they are in adulthood and can really think about it more.

I really think my DS (17) knows....he has made comments about how "NICE" dad was to various woman during the M.

Mind you....they were always the most upstanding woman - you know....like the nice lady with the house-arrest anklet at the bar where he had my DS at.



Eyes are useless if the mind is blind.


Posts: 2176 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 2:49 PM, October 8th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it's his place to share what he did. However when he asks you, if he ever does, you tell him that you loved him very much, but he couldn't fufill his end of what an M should be, and you couldn't allow him to disrespect you, and have your son grow up in a home believing that is what a healthy normal relationship was.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8698 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
little turtle
♀ Member
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 3:23 PM, October 8th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I worry about this as well. My kids wouldn't understand it today if I tried to explain to them what happened (they are 5 and 7). But one day, they will be able to understand.


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4202 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Topic Posts: 4

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