Sorry you find yourself here surprise. Nothing about this situation we have found ourselves in is fair.
Seek legal advice about your rights regarding the kids etc.
I too used alcohol as a coping mechanism, its not a good one. I used it during the relationship to quiet my screaming gut. After Dday I stopped as it doesn't help and is only an ineffective bandaid. The only way through this is through it - there are no shortcuts.
Take care of yourself, try to eat and keep hydrated with non-alcoholic beverages. Focus on doing what is healthy for you and your kids.
Me: Awesome - 35.... ummm, not anymore
Welcome and sorry you have had to join our ranks.
"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou