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Newest Member: Finnsmom (45312)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: The other woman is his ex
thebirdcage
♀ New Member
Member # 39274
Default  Posted: 9:51 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And I can't stop friggin obsessing over her today. For the first time I looked at her FB- which she has public of course. I don't know why I did it. She totally devestated my world and she appears like things are great with her:

She's lost weight- I've gained because I'm pregnant

She's gone to cancun, San Francisco , DC and Colorado- I've gone no where

She died her hair the color I want mine. And her hair is long and thick and mine is short and thin

She seems so happy. I just can't shake it. I'm jealous. I don't know why. But I am. And she bothers me. I hate that I'm wasting time on someone who deserves none of it. I usually don't think about her and I've never looked at her Facebook. But today- for some reason. I had a weak moment. And I can't talk to H about it. We will just get upset that I'm bringing her up and wasting my time on her. I'm blaming the pregnancy hormones. I having a rough time.

I want to hear bad things about her. I want her to be miserable and in pain. I want gf he to feel what I felt. I'm usually pretty Buddhist about it all and wish her the best. But not today. Today I hate her and want to punch her in the face and see her cry.


Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2013
Hrtbrken1
♀ Member
Member # 33802
Default  Posted: 7:08 AM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pm sent.

Hang in there!


Me-BW
Him-WH
Together 16 years, married 10.
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.

Posts: 144 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Sunny South
Hrtbrken1
♀ Member
Member # 33802
Default  Posted: 7:08 AM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

double post

[This message edited by Hrtbrken1 at 7:08 AM, September 13th (Friday)]


Me-BW
Him-WH
Together 16 years, married 10.
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.

Posts: 144 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Sunny South
Blobette
♀ Member
Member # 36519
Default  Posted: 9:05 AM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, you CAN communicate to your WH that you're feeling vulnerable and triggery and insecure and that you need him to reassure you. My WH is FINALLY getting that the RIGHT response when I trigger is not "stop worrying about that" but "I'm so sorry that I've made you feel this way". That he shouldn't address the substance but the feelings behind it. And, given that you're pregnant, you get even MORE slack!


BS (me): 50
WS: 50
Married: 26 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

Posts: 1060 | Registered: Aug 2012
thebirdcage
♀ New Member
Member # 39274
Default  Posted: 2:10 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've tried. Sometimes he says the right thing and just apologizes. But most of the time bringing her up really upsets him. I see his logic. But it's the emotions I loose it with.

Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2013
crazyblindsided
♀ Member
Member # 35215
Default  Posted: 2:39 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But it's the emotions I loose it with.

This is my problem too


BS/FWS (me):40 Madhatter
WS/BS:42 Serial Cheater
Together 18 years, Married 13
DD(10) DS(7)
DDay(s) 5/08, 5/09, 3/30/12
Final Dday 7/11/14 Affair never ended

Posts: 2266 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
Topic Posts: 6

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