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User Topic: Update on he doesn't know that I know
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 1:18 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love this thread so much that I came back to reread it again today.

(((Karmita))) I hope you are hanging in there. We are all living vicariously thru you.


Me: BW
Him: WH --Had 7 mo. PA with COW;
Married 20something years with kids
Trying to R

Posts: 1458 | Registered: Dec 2012
idkam
♀ Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 1:44 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Omg!! I love this post.. Thank you so much for inviting us into ur world... I know you are hurting but honey that will pass and you will be so much stronger than before, although that party you through showed hou are one helluva woman...

I agree with the person who said you should be a party planner for BS's..... I almost choked on my salad reading your post.....

Loved it....

Hang in there and take care of yourself...


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1810 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
Hrtbrken1
♀ Member
Member # 33802
Default  Posted: 2:04 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

SUPER SLOW APPLAUSE

In the history of awesome, you are the awesomest.


Me-BW
Him-WH
Together 16 years, married 10.
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.

Posts: 144 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Sunny South
momwith2boys
♀ New Member
Member # 37459
Default  Posted: 4:17 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow that is awesome! I would have loved to seen his face when he walked in! Ow was a friend to me too. I wish I had the balls that u have!!
So has he contacted u yet? Is he trying to win u back?


Me BW 35
husband 35
Married 10 years, together 13 years
OW-my so called "friend"
2 boys (7 & 3)
D-day 10/17/2012
D-day2-2/24/2013 told me it was her
D-day3-6/16/2013 found out affair never ended
Working on R

Posts: 35 | Registered: Nov 2012
CatchyUsername
♀ Member
Member # 39415
Default  Posted: 8:27 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Karmita - WOW - amazing!! It was like you took every fantasy I ever had and made it REAL! I often say to WH that he is SO SO SO lucky I found out the way I did and not 3 days earlier because (i say) I would have done something very similar. I am in awe!

That said - try to be OK with wallowing in a sad place. You ran a HUGE marathon and now you need to rest and recover. Give yourself permission. You certainly earned it. You need to mourn in order for this to get processed and packaged away.

(((HUGS)))


Posts: 191 | Registered: Jun 2013
Karmita
♀ Member
Member # 40183
Default  Posted: 12:53 PM, September 15th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A-hole is how I refer to my soon to be ex-husband showed up at my sister's house this morning. He wanted to talk to me. WTF is there to talk about....I don't want to see his face or hear his voice. Shouldn't he be thrilled he and HAUREN are free to be together now that I'm gone.


Posts: 76 | Registered: Aug 2013
trytoforgive
♀ Member
Member # 27330
Default  Posted: 2:33 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey Karmita,

Just checking on you...


Me- W 38
Him- H 40
Long time lurker...Sometimes poster...
DDay 8/14/2009

DD 15
DS 10


Posts: 452 | Registered: Jan 2010
WeepingBuddhist
♀ Member
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 3:02 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wishing you well on the next part of your journey!


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 664 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 3:07 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Shouldn't he be thrilled he and HAUREN are free to be together now that I'm gone.

Now that his A has been outed, the thrill is gone, & it may fall apart.

Be prepared now for a lot of minimizing, gas lighting, & rug sweeping. It seems that it was a deal breaker for you anyway, so just let your lawyer communicate with his lawyer.



Me: BW
Him: WH --Had 7 mo. PA with COW;
Married 20something years with kids
Trying to R

Posts: 1458 | Registered: Dec 2012
heartbroken7110
♀ Member
Member # 36818
Default  Posted: 3:53 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A
m
A
Z
I
N
G
!!!!!!!


Me:30 Him:34
Married 8 yrs (together 16years)2 Kids
Dday 4/08 (TT until 9/11)
Slowlyyyy paving the road to R...most days.

Posts: 87 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: NJ
Karmita
♀ Member
Member # 40183
Default  Posted: 5:19 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I went back to work this week. Also saw my lawyer and will be filing for divorce. I am done.
A letter has been sent to my husband that all contact will be conducted through my lawyer. We don't have much to split up. I took half of our savings when I left.

Going to stay with my sister until I find an apartment. All my stuff is crammed in her garage. I feel like a refugee.

I'm doing ok...I've developed a potty mouth though. I'm still so mad, but I prefer that to feeling so sad.


Posts: 76 | Registered: Aug 2013
3kids30years
♀ Member
Member # 38879
Default  Posted: 6:48 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Karmita!

I admire you so very, very much! If I only had the nerve! But after 30 years and 3 kids, I opted to attempt to R.

But I also developed a potty mouth - told WH to deal with it, or get the F*ck out. (see I told you!)


BS - mid 50's
WH - mid 50's
DDay - 3/2/13 - 2:07pm
TT until 9/02/13
NC broken 4/15/14
2year+ "passionate" EA/PA

Married 30+ years and here I am. Heartbroken.
4/14 Trying to make it thru each day
9/14 - getting better. we


Posts: 218 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Nor Cal
thisissogross
♀ Member
Member # 30294
Default  Posted: 7:12 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Back when I joined there was much discussion about how this junk can turn anybody into a batshit crazy pottymouth. I believe that was in at least one member's tag line as a matter of fact. It can be all one word 'batshit-crazy-pottymouth' I always thought that did sum it up nicely.

Anyway, I am sorry for all you're dealing with. Your sister sounds awesome and so do you. I engineered a dday blowup also (nowhere near as rad as yours) and I know what you mean about not feeling anything but devastation. Everybody's told you right though. It took a while, but boy did I eventually get my laugh and feeling of overwhelming badassness. You've handled a very difficult situation with aplomb approaching glamour, glamour I tell you, and soon enough you will feel that and be so proud of yourself.

Really sorry you're feeling displaced. Here's hoping you find somewhere wonderful to settle into soon. And in the meantime, at least you've found a place where your pottymouth is well understood and accepted.

[This message edited by thisissogross at 7:18 PM, September 19th (Thursday)]


"A pair of powerful spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love." -Friedrich Nietzsche

i edit frequently because i have to


Posts: 241 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: southern us
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 8:22 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

dear (((Karmita)))
we are all so proud of you.
you are an inspiration to us all.
Hang in there sweetheart. You will be ok. & you will always be able to hold your head up high.


Me: BW
Him: WH --Had 7 mo. PA with COW;
Married 20something years with kids
Trying to R

Posts: 1458 | Registered: Dec 2012
dead_inside
♀ Member
Member # 3438
Default  Posted: 8:32 PM, September 19th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My god but that is epic.


Me: FORMER BW
Him: WXH


Posts: 756 | Registered: Feb 2004
refuz2bavictim
♀ Member
Member # 27176
Default  Posted: 3:42 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm still so mad, but I prefer that to feeling so sad.

Yes. The anger feels much more empowering than the sadness.

The high of having some control for once, may have worn off, and you may fee like a refugee, but the self control with which you pulled off the "surprise", will serve you well.

Hang in there.

I wish I had half the creativity and self control you did. I don't think Karma could have done the job nearly as well.


BS:ME DDay: 7/18/09 Last of TT 7/11/10
MOW's EA/PA all were my "friends" but one


Posts: 2372 | Registered: Jan 2010
homewrecked2011
♀ Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 4:16 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


"This is how we move it"!


DO NOT TALK TO WH NOR OW -- It eats them alive! Trust me on this! OW was my friend and I have NEVER said a word to her once I had him served. It is the ONE thing I have power over --


The funniest thing is that you woke him up from "the fog" in an epic way, and you are gone just when he comes back to reality.

Honestly, thank God that you are gone before you had children together. On this site is a forum -- I can relate - and one of the threads is for betrayed husbands. When I read of their honesty, I realize there are really decent men out there and I am so proud of myself for suprising WH with divorce papers.

Epic!


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2328 | Registered: Jan 2012
sleepless34
♀ Member
Member # 40274
Default  Posted: 11:33 AM, September 20th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love love love love it.

I could never have pulled it off, because I wouldn't have been able to pretend all was fine once I knew.....you have awesome self control. This is so good, best story ever. You win! BAHAHAHAHAHA


Me BW- 40ish, awesome
Cheating scusband 40ish
2 kids, elementary school age
Bomb dropped Aug 4 out of nowhere...

Posts: 443 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Hell
SurelyNOT
♀ Member
Member # 40617
Default  Posted: 1:42 PM, September 27th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is such a WONDERFUL post. I really hope you are taking care of yourself, don't forget to look after #1. Your revenge was just priceless, oh to have been a fly on the wall witnessing his and her responses
I hope everything goes well on your journey, it's a bit of an uphill battle, BUT you are so capable, and so very worth it, onwards and upwards.
Thanks for making me smile, you are a pure tonic - don't ever lose your sense of humour

Posts: 95 | Registered: Sep 2013
cl131716
♀ Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 1:46 PM, September 27th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow! You are my hero! Really I wish I had the guts to do something like this.


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
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