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User Topic: do you ever wonder if it's to good to be true?
soconfusednow
♀ Member
Member # 40078
Default  Posted: 12:13 PM, September 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So there have been several times I've been told "it's over" & several times I've found broken NC.

This time though I have access to everything, he reassures me in different ways, takes pictures for me, hugs me, wraps his arm around me in bed at night, says I can come to his work anytime I want, does more with me, encourages me to take better care of myself, initiates thing to do together, says he wants to be transparent, invites me to join him in things he did without me before............the list goes on.

But part of me is scared it's to good to be true. Is it because the past breaks in NC have made it hard to trust? Am I just too insecure?

Is my gut telling me something I need to know, but don't want to believe or accept?

I don't want him to be with me 24/7, because I want him to enjoy the things he likes to do, that I don't. I don't want to be his babysitter, I want to be his Wife.


D-Day January 2013
prior EA in the 90's
me 50
WH 52
NC-several
last broken NC 7/2013 (hopefully)
Married 29 years
2 kids
Want to believe it's over, but is it really? Will I ever trust again?

Posts: 317 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
HurtButHoping12
♀ Member
Member # 34918
Default  Posted: 12:19 PM, September 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel like this every single day, and we are 2 years out from DDay. At first I really thought it was my gut telling me something... but after investigating over and over, I've come to learn that (so far) it's just my insecurities about my WH 's commitment to our marriage.


BW (me):30
WH (guiltfilled11): 31
together 11 years, married 5 years
DDay: July 6th 2011
False R: beginning of August
True R until DDay 06/20 - talking to another girl and lying about it
Kids: DD 7, DS 4, DD 3

On the fence... do I stay or do


Posts: 183 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: NY
soconfusednow
♀ Member
Member # 40078
Default  Posted: 12:26 PM, September 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thank you, HurtButHoping12, I find it hopeful that I'm not the only one that feels this way.

I've been keeping my eyes open, looking at things & found nothing recently............. except a husband that tries to reassure me whenever he sees that look on my face.

[This message edited by soconfusednow at 12:28 PM, September 7th (Saturday)]


D-Day January 2013
prior EA in the 90's
me 50
WH 52
NC-several
last broken NC 7/2013 (hopefully)
Married 29 years
2 kids
Want to believe it's over, but is it really? Will I ever trust again?

Posts: 317 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
shatteredheart7
♀ Member
Member # 39734
Default  Posted: 12:32 PM, September 7th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Every day!

He has had nc with her since April 2012, hasn't been with her since Feb 2012... but I am still scared every day of my life that she will contact him again and he won't tell me and will start talking to her again.I don't hide that from him and he does everything in his power to reassure me, but it is part of my own insecurity.


Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!

Posts: 240 | Registered: Jul 2013
Topic Posts: 4

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