For 2 years, I told him I needed him here on Thursdays.
You see, we have 3 small children and I work on Thursday evenings. Even though I work from home, it's almost impossible to do my job while managing dinner, homework, and bedtime at the same time.
But for 2 years Thursday night softball was more important. It didn't matter that his family needed him -- that *I* needed him. When I told him how much we needed him here on those nights, he would glare at me disgustingly and act like I was so incompetent.
He went online and found a ONS via a dating service. He told me he didn't realize he had an early softball game...then he met OW#2 for dinner and fucked her.
Do you know how many Thursdays he talked to OW#3 during his 6 month EA? I do.
Because I counted them.
Six-effing-teen Thursdays he talked to her while I was at home taking care of our family and making a paycheck.
Thursdays were the days I volunteered at the school. I spent the day helping our teachers while affirming parental presence for our children, then came home to make dinner, deal with homework, and then work...and he couldn't be bothered.
On the Thursdays he was home, he sat with his effing laptop open for 7 or 8 hours, staring at the effing TV she bought for him. Fantasizing about a better life without us, I'm sure.
He didn't pack lunches or get backpacks ready. He didn't do the dinner dishes or clear the table.
Nope. Just sat there in his own EFFING little world.
Come Friday (his day off), HE slept until 10 or 11 am. *I* got up with the children, did the morning routine, and made sure they got there on time. Didn't matter that I had worked half the night away.
We have a daughter with a medical condition that requires constant monitoring. Tonight he had every indication that she needed an intervention, but he half-assed his way through it instead of just doing what needed to be done the first time, and getting it over with.
So, when my shift is over at midnight -- GUESS WHAT? There's still a problem. Who has to deal with it now...while he's sleeping?? This shizz could have been dealt with HOURS ago.
Oh, and I just cleared the dinner table, filled the dishwasher, and washed the pots in the sink.
It's almost 1 am.
She's going to need more monitoring before the night is over with. Pretty sure I'll be up dealing with it at 3 am...if she doesn't crash before then.
I can't help but to wonder what he was doing out here...so distracted from his responsibilities while I was in the office working.
I woke him up, and told him how upset I was.
He got up and went to the bathroom; then got back into bed, rolled over, and went back to sleep.
So much for being loving, supportive and reassuring during triggers.