I would have ended the date after about an hour, but I stayed almost two hours, to give him more time to overcome my first impression, as well as because I was meeting a friend at 8 to go on a lake cruise and I thought it was better to give him more time rather than to sit at a bar by myself.
Today, he sent me this message: "How was your boat ride last night? I think you picked a better night because with it only being in the 50's right now it would be too cold out on the lake for a day in Aug. I was curious what you thought about me and what you thought about last night?"
I responded: "Thanks for the message. It was nice to meet you last night, and it's too bad that we weren't a match. I wish you the best of luck in finding the right lady for you!"
He replies: "I thought we had some things I'm common to explore getting to know each other more but I guess you feel different. I realise we only where meeting for drinks but felt awkward you where leaving to go meet someone else right away. Good luck find that special someone but it sounds like you have a lot going on."
Totally blaming me! (I did make it clear that I was meeting girlfriends.) I should just ignore, right? Because I really want to write something like this:
"You have no idea how much I had to stifle the urge to pin you down and brush and floss your teeth. I'm not sure if those are permanent stains in between each of them or if it's food (it looked so much like food, but how could that be since it was all of them?), but I almost got physically sick when I thought about kissing you.
You were quite boring, told inappropriate stories, and your "jokes" weren't funny at all. Yes, I own a house. No, you are not moving in. Also, jokes usually are funny, not awkward statements about how sad your life is and how desperate you are for a girlfriend.
Don't blame your awkwardness on me having to leave early. I didn't tell you I had to leave until about 10 minutes before I did. And if I hadn't had other plans, I would have left an hour earlier. You are a giant loser, and your pathetic attempt to blame me for us not being a match is laughable."
Oh man, I really want to go on, but instead I will delete him from my e-mail and focus on the next date :)
Married: 11 years, no kids
The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo
How do you not check your teeth before a date? Heck, I check my teeth for lipstick smears before I go to the grocery store! Yuck!
“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön
After reading about others experiences with finding diamonds in the rough, I'm trying to be more open minded too and to say yes to a date with guys I'm not initially attracted to on line. It isn't working so well so far though...
Only once did a guy text me and want "feedback", and I was honest. I was honest because he didn't project onto me, or blame, or accuse...just wanted to know.
If I get a whiff of
Totally blaming me!
Oops - I mean....yes, crickets.
One other weird thing he said is he was bragging about how he knows how to treat women since he grew up with two sisters. For example, you can never compliment a woman (though he kept saying "girl") on a new haircut because she'll burst out in tears if she doesn't like it. So you just say, "Oh, you got a haircut!" and then take your cue from her as to what to say next.
I'm not losing any sleep over it, and though I've thought of several other things I wish I could say to him, I have maintained my silence. This foray into OLD might be another short one :)