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User Topic: Roller coaster = madness
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 4:18 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Heaven help me there are days I swing so wildly between feelings I get emotional whiplash. I am on a low dose of lexapro, so it could be even worse I suppose. I often feel like I am descending into madness. Not really a point or advice request - just venting. Blah. Cheaters suck.


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller


Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 4:26 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Tripletrouble)))

There were so many days I thought I would end up in a padded room. I needed people to tell me that I really wasn't going permanently crazy what you are experiencingis normal. I am sorry you are there.

It does get easier. It really does.


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2600 | Registered: Aug 2012
crazyblindsided
♀ Member
Member # 35215
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Indeed it is


BS/FWS (me):40 Madhatter
WS/BS:42 Serial Cheater
Together 18 years, Married 13
DD(10) DS(7)
DDay(s) 5/08, 5/09, 3/30/12
Final Dday 7/11/14 Affair never ended

Posts: 2266 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
TheRealDeal
♀ Member
Member # 39560
Default  Posted: 7:10 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((tripletrouble) we can all relate.

I asked doc for RX 2 weeks ago, got Lexapro filled and then thought "I should just be strong enough to handle this" and never took it.

as I took my evening walk tonight I realized I'm fooling myself. I do need something 'more' to help me through my days. I will be taking the first pill tonight before bed.

rollercoaster ride from hell and I want off please


Me: 45, him: 54
together 18 years
DDay1 March 2013, Dday2 April 27, 2013, Dday3 June 1, 2013
We are in R and trying to make it
Never lose yourself trying to hang onto someone who doesn't care about losing you.

Posts: 249 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Northeast
sodamnlost
♀ Member
Member # 37190
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

10 months out and still there sadly. Maybe not so many times in one day but spending part of my week madly in love with WH and most of the week thinking "yeah - umm - no f'in way, this was a dealbreaker" is taking it's toll on both of us.


If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck - it's not a fluffy pink unicorn squirting liquid rainbows, complete with pots of gold out of it's ass.

Posts: 766 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Nowhere pretty
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 7:27 PM, August 6th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

rollercoaster ride from hell and I want off please

Couldn't have said it better myself. I often say, "I just want the pain to stop". Wish we could all wake up from this freakin' nightmare!

But, we will carry on! We will get stronger! It will get better!

Live moment to moment when you need to. Take a walk. Go for a run. Breathe in. Breathe out. Feel the sun on your face. And TRY to sleep...


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 692 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 12:54 AM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

AD's do help. I didn't realize how well they were working until I was out for 5 days. I started feeling hopeless again. Sorry bout the roller coaster hell, we've all been on at times.


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5075 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
Bluebird26
♀ Member
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 2:50 AM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

yes it does. My post on fb yesterday was I want off this ride.


"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1349 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Completelybroken
♀ Member
Member # 40051
Default  Posted: 3:39 AM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've always hated roller coasters!! Especially ones I didn't intentionally get on!!!


Me-BS 31
Him-FWH 37
Dday-7-6-13
EA-1yr
PA sex 3-4times over three months during the EA

Posts: 93 | Registered: Jul 2013
ItsaClimb
♀ Member
Member # 37107
Default  Posted: 4:04 AM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I totally agree. The thing that has surprised me is how long this roller-coaster ride is! Coming up for my 1 year antiversary and I had a major dip on the roller-coaster this weekend just gone


BS 46
Together 29 yrs, M 25 years
2 daughters 24yo(married with a brand new little daughter) & 19yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later

Posts: 988 | Registered: Oct 2012
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 3:16 PM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read somewhere (here? In a book?) that the horrible thing about the roller coaster is that each emotion feels like the final decision while you're experiencing it. So when you feel like it's a deal breaker, then dammit, it's over!!! But then when you feel loving, it's all good and it's all going to be okay and you're going to have a new better relationship. And these feelings can change in mere minutes! You not only can't trust the wayward, you can't even trust your own feelings. UGH! The f*ckery of it!!!


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller


Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
kansas1968
♀ Member
Member # 32214
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I really did think I was going crazy for the first couple of months. When that changed is when I ordered a book, "Not Just Friends." Then I knew I wasn't acting like a lunatic, I was reacting normally to one of life's most damaging events.

Then I got a counsellor and I found this site. It wasn't smooth sailing after that, but at least I knew I wasn't nuts. The WS at first was even agreeing with me being nuts.
He quite that pronto when I got enough information to know that I wasn't.


Me - BS
Him - FWS
DD - December 14, 2010
Married 43 years 1/14/2011
Affair lasted 7+ years
Affair had been over for 2 years before I found out. OW sent me a letter.

Posts: 1314 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Kansas
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, August 7th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

the horrible thing about the roller coaster is that each emotion feels like the final decision while you're experiencing it.

This just nailed it for me. Every time I think I've come to a resolution and feel confident in my decision, I suddenly take a mad swing the other way.

The ups and downs make me want to


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 692 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
Topic Posts: 13

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