For my bday he gave me Trich.
He prescribed the antibiotics for it and told me I had a yeast infection. Antibiotics for yeast? Oh that was supposedly in case it was also a bacterial vaginosis.
And no, there were no other bday gifts, cards or a cake.
I want to smash it into pieces.
Go for it!! It's quite therapeutic.
I had received a gift card from Zales and diamond earrings on separate occasions. I gave them away. The "gifts" were absolutely meaningless to me after D-day.
Now my then WS never went out of his way to buy me something like that unless I specifically asked for it...so I never got gifts like that, EVER.
But later found out that he bought it from the place that is OW's mother worked. So I was trying to imagine him standing there with the woman he was screwing, letting her stand there with him while he bought something from her own mother so her mother could get a commission on the jewelry and he would look like he was a "big spender".
So what kind of fucked up is that? The OW let him buy it and he stood there and did it like it was OK without her own mother knowing that she was screwing a married man. Both of them were really screwed up.
I never wore that bracelet. It was just too weird.
Looking back, I wonder how she could have written those things, without just feeling like a complete piece of shit, knowing what she had just done. Four years later, I still cringe whenever I get a card from her and have to open it, wondering what she's written.
me - husband A46
her - wife A42
Married 17 years
D-Day August 2, 2009
3 kids 11, 13, and 15
Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller
He even called me early during the day of my birthday. I remembered being surprised and pleased that he was thinking of me enough to call me during his work day! I was able to look at his phone bill and found a call to the OW on the same day.
Two days after my trip was dday which was also two days after his mother passed away. I never had the chance to see her before she died.
on a side note speaking of smashing things our first Christmas I was so excited to open my gifts. It was three big boxes I had no idea what he would have gotten me. Well it turned out to be a hurricane lamp! Lets just say I was beyond surprised with his thoughtful gift. Ok... really I hated that thing and it sat by my bed for 33 years. Of course, I couldn't tell him that I didn't like it because he would have been mad that I didn't like what he had so thoughtfully gotten me from a hardware store. To bad I didn't see the signs all those years ago of suppressing my feelings. Maybe I'll ask for it in the settlement and then smash it to smithereens.
There is also a necklace he bought me when he was in Thailand. It has semi-precious stones, including my birthstone. I plan on taking it to a pawn shop and getting whatever they want to give me. I don't want it. I'm not even convinced that he didn't have a whore with him when he picked it out (he claims he didn't, but then again he spent 10 years claiming he didn't cheat on me so.... )
There are two fake faberge eggs he bought in China, on his way back from Thailand. One for me, one for our DD. I haven't decided what to do with those. I don't want them, but I might keep them for my DD, if she really wants them.
The snowglobe...smash the sucker.
One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. ~Steven Deitz
After he moved out, I went from room to room hefty bagging what he left behind. My youngest and I took those 2 shot glasses and snow globes to the garage and BUSTED THE HELL OUT OF THEM WITH A HAMMER!
It was so much fun! After we were done, we scraped up the little pieces, put them in a plastic grocery bag and then stuck that bag in a box of his stuff. I also took all of the magnets from his business trips off the fridge and put them in the same box. When he moved home, as I cleaned out his apartment kitchen, I tossed out the magnets related to the cities where he f'ed OW3 and 4.
Oh, on a different note, in 20 years together the man only gave me flowers 2 times. I found on our Proflowers account that he sent OW4 2 dozen roses a month after he moved out, professing his love for her. Sad thing is she prefers tulips - I'm the rose person. This year for Mother's Day, he got me tulips... Yes, he's been corrected!
So I make ANOTHER one for valentines day and he's in another affair by April.... That one is hanging in a guest bedroom...,
[This message edited by rachelc at 4:54 PM, August 6th (Tuesday)]
me (WW/BS): 48
4 kiddos in mid 20's
Me: I didn't sign up for this.
Him: you're already in this. All you can do is resign...
Trash the snow globe ~
The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.
How do you buy something for someone so personal and romantic while you're romantically involved with someone else?
Right? I mean WTF!!!
My WH gave me a diamond necklace for Valentine's Day and my favorite perfume during his involvement with MOW. I gave it back to him
Today we have bits of lovely agate lining the rosebed.
Also, there's this stupid ring... He bought it as a sort of R ring, but then decided that the perfect moment to give it to me was while I was peeing. He barged into the bathroom, saw I was on the toilet, then kinda tossed it at me in a panic. How romantic. I get that he was flustered and his intentions were good (though I still can't imagine why giving me the ring in the bathroom was high on the perfect places list), but it's a big trigger for me. I can't and don't wear it. Every time I look at it, I shake my head and roll my eyes.
I get that he was flustered and his intentions were good (though I still can't imagine why giving me the ring in the bathroom was high on the perfect places list), but it's a big trigger for me
OMGosh!!!! Sorry for laughing, but the mental picture of this had me rolling. It just couldn't wait another two minutes while you finished up in there, it had to be at that exact moment!?!.... I'm not laughing at you Carnelian, just the strange sense of (or lack of) timing.
So, no gifts, but he sure did give her a lot of the things that were special to us...
Just wanted to say very insightful! Perfect way to word it, got me thinking about how those other things given away during the A are much more meaningful than the physical gifts.
Smash the globe!
Mister rabbit says, "A moment of realization is worth a thousand prayers."