As a BS, I've been working a lot on what I brought to the marriage that made it suck - pre-cheating. Here's my take on your question:
I don't think a therapeutic separation is a bad idea at all - but I wonder if it's too... soon? Will either of you be able to be objective about what dysfunction you EACH brought to the marriage this soon after DDay, or are your wounds too recent?
Kudos to you for accepting a dysfunctional aspect of your own personality: you admit you are "controlling"
Have you gotten to the bottom of WHY you are controlling?
AND - what OTHER dysfunction did you bring to the marriage?
Are you afraid of abandonment?
Do you have a low self esteem?
Do you have an anger problem?
Are you ready to face WHY you have your other issues? Digging in the dirt hurts - it's unlocking doors that your hurt-little-kid-self locked for a reason. They hurt too much to deal with, hence the coping mechanisms you learned as a kid. Perhaps you learned to be controlling because:
Your mother was inconsistent and undependable?
Your father was abusive?
One of your parents left you?
You were berated for being ignorant as a child for things a child wouldn't or couldn't know?
Taking such a painful inventory of your own issues is not an easy task when your wounds are so fresh after DDay... Is that what you plan to do while separated?
I know there's NO WAY I could have let my WH out of my sight that early after DDay... will the separation make you MORE controlling? Will it make you CONSTANTLY check up on her? Will it make you feel even MORE insecure? If so, then I would tell her you aren't ready to trust her with such freedom yet.
NOW: has SHE openly recognized any dysfunctional aspects of HER personality? After all, she wouldn't be with a "controlling" man if she herself didn't have some serious issues.
Does she have abandonment issues?
Does she have F(amily) O(f) O(rigin) issues that she has never faced (like most people)?
Does she have an abusive, neglectful or judgemental parent in her past? Did she suffer from sexual abuse?
Does she even PLAN on working on HER issues while separated, or is she just wanting a break from the constant guilt trip you (most likely and with very good reason, IMO) are giving her? She doesn't deserve to run away from your hurt - she should be neck-deep in it with you. BUT - if she intends to use the time apart to address her issues and fix herself, then maybe it'll be worth doing.
I am separated myself in order to work on MY ISSUES that contributed to my broken marriage BEFORE the infidelity started (really, before I even met my H). My WH is supposed to be doing the same. It's early in our Separation. We'll see how this all pans out...
Good luck, and sorry for the rambling and possibly off-putting tone of my post. One thing I'm learning: it's HARD to be honest with oneself.
edited for continuity