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Newest Member: StillHurtingHer (45319)

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User Topic: Should I notify ow about hsv1?
Justmiserable
♀ New Member
Member # 39388
Default  Posted: 10:47 AM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Weepingbuddist I do disagree. I have zero desire to connect with her but I've researched hsv1 extensively since the test results came back. Just google hsv1 and babies and you will see that it even led to the death of a newborn. I've personally seen a toddler with it at daycare and its much more serious than a simple cold sore. Also, HSV1 can be transmitted to the genitals during oral sex and act the same as genital herpes, but it causes fewer outbreaks. 30% of genital herpes outbreaks are caused by HSV1 according to my research.


me-BS,FWS madhatter (36)
him-BS, FWS (39)
2 children 17 and 13
Married 13 years
Ow-(36)Stranger that he met on POF
D-day 10/03/2012
status: in recovery, NC with OW since shortly after DDay

Posts: 36 | Registered: May 2013
Justmiserable
♀ New Member
Member # 39388
Default  Posted: 8:04 AM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So I've decided to let it go. If 60-80% of the population has this, what's the harm in keeping it to myself? I just pray that if I ever do get an outbreak, it's a fever blister and not the genitals. I hate having to worry about it at all but after reading the std support thread on ICR, I feel pretty fortunate that this is all I caught.


me-BS,FWS madhatter (36)
him-BS, FWS (39)
2 children 17 and 13
Married 13 years
Ow-(36)Stranger that he met on POF
D-day 10/03/2012
status: in recovery, NC with OW since shortly after DDay

Posts: 36 | Registered: May 2013
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If 60-80% of the population has this, what's the harm in keeping it to myself?

Really? Did you not post this yesterday?

Just google hsv1 and babies and you will see that it even led to the death of a newborn. I've personally seen a toddler with it at daycare and its much more serious than a simple cold sore


Choices, Chances, Changes.....You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.

Posts: 13803 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
tryin2havefaith
♀ Member
Member # 37165
Default  Posted: 8:32 AM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

CNN posted something recently with a link to inform anonymously .


ME- BS
HIM- WS
DDay 1/2011
4 - 6 months of TT'ing
Fully R'd
"Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects. " -Dalai Lama

Posts: 265 | Registered: Oct 2012
Justmiserable
♀ New Member
Member # 39388
Default  Posted: 12:17 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If I could inform her anonymously I would gladly do so. It's just so hard when my own dr shrugged it off as nothing and I really don't want any type of contact with this woman. I will google and see what type of anonymous ways I could let her know. I feel so conflicted and I've gotten really conflicting advise.


me-BS,FWS madhatter (36)
him-BS, FWS (39)
2 children 17 and 13
Married 13 years
Ow-(36)Stranger that he met on POF
D-day 10/03/2012
status: in recovery, NC with OW since shortly after DDay

Posts: 36 | Registered: May 2013
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's just so hard when my own dr shrugged it off as nothing

Well, it's not nothing if you don't have it and then get diagnosed with it.


Choices, Chances, Changes.....You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.

Posts: 13803 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
Justmiserable
♀ New Member
Member # 39388
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok, so I found a website called don't spread it and it allowed me to send an anonymous email. It did not differentiate between hsv1 and hsv2 so I had to just choose herpes. Not only do I feel a sense of relief for sending the email, but I've also gotten a wicked satisfaction that she will have to get tested to see which type it is. Maybe she can suffer over the worry like I did. Words cannot express my hatred for this woman. I'm shaking after sending the email because just typing her email address triggers my anxiety. Thank God I have a pill for that. Thanks for the nudge lieshurt, I needed it to get my nerve up.


me-BS,FWS madhatter (36)
him-BS, FWS (39)
2 children 17 and 13
Married 13 years
Ow-(36)Stranger that he met on POF
D-day 10/03/2012
status: in recovery, NC with OW since shortly after DDay

Posts: 36 | Registered: May 2013
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 12:27 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You did a good thing and I'm glad you could do it anonymously.


Choices, Chances, Changes.....You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.

Posts: 13803 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
purplejacket4
♀ Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 12:39 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

FP doc here:

HSV 1 is herpes labialis (fancy way of saying cold sores). More than 50% of people have been exposed. It's not worth worrying about from a medical perspective.

I would only advise Hep B, C, and HIV be disclosed under these circumstances. They can actually kill you and others.


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2238 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
Want2help
♀ Member
Member # 20547
Default  Posted: 4:27 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would not contact her at all, or if you do, have your H do it.

I warned OW when I found out she had not used condoms with my FWH that FWH had an incurable STD (she and I were on the phone at the time), and had since before I had met him, (he just didn't feel the need to warn OW).

To repay the favor, she told everyone she knew, and they plastered my name all over the internet, nicknaming me a symptom of this particular disease.

Now, my OW is of a particularly heinous variety, and your may not respond the same, but it was NOT worth the effort. OW likely has found out whether or not she contracted the disease, and I was humiliated for nothing.


BS- me.
FWS- him.
DDay 6/07 (immediately separated)
RDay 8/07
OC born 3/08
OC Adopted 2014

Reconciled


Posts: 2309 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: PNW
Topic Posts: 30
Pages: 1 · 2

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