Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
Find a Local Couselor
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: Juniper (43177)

I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Betrayed Men Part 12
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ironically, having gone through this and given way too much thought to it, I see how easy it would be to go around committing adultery with married women.

No kidding Later, as B444 said, like picking low hanging fruit. For the easiest pickings, find one in her 40s. If the internet is to be believed, there are men who specifically target married woman. It makes sense if you think about it - sex without commitment. And the expense. You can't really buy the married woman anything real expensive that will stand out. You can't move in with her, so no bills. Perfect. If you have no soul, that is.

ETA: Speaking of B444, where has our brother been hiding lately? Hope he's doing ok.

[This message edited by Sal1995 at 7:26 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


Me-45
WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 10 month PA/EA
Final NC late Feb. '13
M - 18 years, together 19+
4 children

Reconciled


Posts: 1025 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
DefiledRage
♂ Member
Member # 39292
Default  Posted: 7:35 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sal
Your thinking of me? I'm touched

adultery with married women

Makes it hard to compete, all the cheap thrills none of the baggage. It really is free love for them. Free that is if you don't care what is doing to your husband/wife and kids.

As far as what I drinking this weekend....Aloha


Me:35 WW:34 M:13yrs
3 young children
Dday 1 EA 7/8/2010
Dday 2 PA 3/1/2013 same OMM for 4yrs

Mister rabbit says, "A moment of realization is worth a thousand prayers."


Posts: 424 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Two blocks from south shit and west hell
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For the easiest pickings, find one in her 40s. If the internet is to be believed, there are men who specifically target married woman. It makes sense if you think about it - sex without commitment. And the expense. You can't really buy the married woman anything real expensive that will stand out. You can't move in with her, so no bills. Perfect.

Yeah, that nails it for my situation. Sucks. Everything you paid dear for they get for free.

Since I don't want to be a bummer, and don't have SG's talent for ramble on "what the fuck did he say" sentences, I'm drinking a Bud Light because it has alcohol in it. Period. I've never been into boutique beers.


Married: 16 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3301 | Registered: Dec 2011
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 7:52 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh no DR, the Lexapro didn't do that to me. I was put on Voltarin at one point, that is what made me mouth fart alien slop.

I sometimes see us, when speaking of the OM and in particular about confronting him, say things like "in the he still will have fucked my wife." I know it's not the real intent, but it might be inferred that speaker is suggesting that he has somehow "bettered" us.

Yeah I'm sure that's true to a degree. If fucking my wife was the thing that made the OM more awesome than me then props to him I guess. If I feel compelled to display some kind of splooge dominance I know where he lives, I can go blow a load in his coffee mug or something.

eta:

And that said, closing the spooge topic and opening one of these, have a good weekend guys.

[This message edited by StillGoing at 7:53 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7101 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
thinkingclear
♂ Member
Member # 38884
Default  Posted: 8:10 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was wondering about Sarge myself the other day. Doesn't seem the same without a good drop smoke and cover your six military analogy every once in awhile.

I hope folks have a good weekend.


BS - Me
WW - Her
10 month EA/PA

Posts: 211 | Registered: Apr 2013
Stillkicking
♂ Member
Member # 38246
Default  Posted: 8:11 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Forward and SG. I have been giving it a go on my own since dday, and thought I was doing a good job at, but a little birdy told me different lol. It's funny cause I spent most of my adult life building a system that would help me function around my ADHD, then the shit storm hits and its like all the work and effort just disappeared. So yeah a little meds to get me back on the straight and narrow cant be that bad.

I must say, SG, your musings are awesome, no matter how many times I have re-read them lol.

SG, just made me shoot rum outta my nose. GOLDEN!!

I dropped the ball tonight, drinking premixed Bacardi n cola. Wasn't in a beer mood

[This message edited by Stillkicking at 8:12 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


You'll never learn to fly
until your standing at the cliff

I reserve my right to feel uncomfortable reserve my right to be afraid.
I make mistakes and I am humbled every step of the way.


Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Canada
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 8:21 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm going to say this once: the ability to fuck my wife is maybe the least interesting thing about me as a human being. Why should I be impressed that someone else can measure up to the very least of what I am?


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 8:29 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Like the tag Tred - fitting...

Speaking of taglines & Billy spear-shaker, my first one was from Sonnet 116,
"Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds"

Whadda dummy I was. That is just not true. My love(s) have altered quite a dam bit thank you - especially after the "alteration" I found.
He goes on to say, at the end of the sonnet:
"If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved."

I guess he couldn't find the right meter for steaming pantload...
Sounds to me like he was trying to pick up a married woman.


Posts: 6005 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Stillkicking
♂ Member
Member # 38246
Default  Posted: 8:34 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm going to say this once: the ability to fuck my wife is maybe the least interesting thing about me as a human being. Why should I be impressed that someone else can measure up to the very least of what I am?

I used to pride myself on my ability to "git er done" before dday always making sure the old lady was finished, now... Couldn't really give a fuck, pun intended. If I drag it out, good for her, if not, well shit on it.


You'll never learn to fly
until your standing at the cliff

I reserve my right to feel uncomfortable reserve my right to be afraid.
I make mistakes and I am humbled every step of the way.


Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Canada
Stillkicking
♂ Member
Member # 38246
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Double post.
Gonna blame that one on Steve jobs and the telus network, not my utter lack of patience. What a dick that guy was.

[This message edited by Stillkicking at 8:39 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


You'll never learn to fly
until your standing at the cliff

I reserve my right to feel uncomfortable reserve my right to be afraid.
I make mistakes and I am humbled every step of the way.


Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Canada
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 8:38 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good one wal. You really have an interesting way of seeing things. Maybe I was just that way w/out even knowing how to articulate it.
In both my M's, the poser was an automatic slimeball. I thank God that was somehow my default setting. Not worth sullying my knuckles on...I don't know.
Maybe a time or two there, but it's been so long.


Posts: 6005 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
WakingFromADream
♂ Member
Member # 33934
Default  Posted: 9:01 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry, a little late to the party as I have a job now where I actually have to pay attention instead of reading SI all day.

I don't really follow the comics but from the movies I really admire Stark. He's a, possibly fatally, flawed person who, given his natural proclivities towards narcissism, could just look out for himself and do whatever the fuck he wants. But, instead makes repeated choices, again and again, for other people rather than for himself. The idea makes me think about something that I read here on SI about M. That getting M is not one choice and one ceremony and one vow but, is a choice and a commitment that you make every day.

Damn. Now thinking about that sucks. While I had a lot to learn I still made that choice every day. And then I didn't because it takes two to have a M. My vocabulary is insufficient to the task of pronouncing my anger and shame and bitterness. This shit sucks.


Me(35) XWW(36) DS(7) DD 11/16/11 EA(PA?) M 11y D 9/3/13

Don't make anyone a priority when you are only an option.


Posts: 1134 | Registered: Nov 2011
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 9:15 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WakingFromADream)))
Do something fun for yourself, it'll slide.

Posts: 6005 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 10:11 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Came back for a PSA: Steam has a Fallout day sale going on, all the Fallout shit is 75% off. So.. New Vegas ultimate edition for 5 bucks, etc. Since we keep bringing that game up. I still haven't wrapped up all the achievements in that game.

eta:
jedi side hugs to you Waking))

[This message edited by StillGoing at 10:12 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7101 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 10:28 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

According to Steam, I logged 125 hours on FO:NV during my playthrough over the last couple of months -- and I didn't even finish one of the DLC's.

I hold you responsible for all those hours, SG, after our last FO3 vs FO:NV debate.

Do you use NMC's textures from the Nexus? The hd upgrade makes that game as far as I'm concerned, along with the Project Nevada mod.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
Stillkicking
♂ Member
Member # 38246
Default  Posted: 10:43 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I haven't played new Vegas, although I did play fallout 3, but got turned off by the constant freezing. I have been playing borderlands 2 for a while now, I had up it down for a couple months, then my oldest showed some interest in it, so I boosted her character and have been just putzing around in it while she learns to play lol. Age appropriate, probably not, but it is good bonding time. Other than that, it is summer and I have all but lost interest in video games.


You'll never learn to fly
until your standing at the cliff

I reserve my right to feel uncomfortable reserve my right to be afraid.
I make mistakes and I am humbled every step of the way.


Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Canada
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 10:50 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

just a quick thought. takingWAL's posit one step further, I got what I thought was an honest caring loving woman. would not have settled for less. POSER on the other hand wanted a lying cheating backstabbing whore.

just saying


BH 50, WW 41
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 19(Hers),DS 8 Ours, DGS 2 1/2
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
“I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.”
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2063 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 11:38 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm going to say this once: the ability to fuck my wife is maybe the least interesting thing about me as a human being.

It's a good point. There are more than 7 billion of us on the earth, so apparently fucking doesn't take much skill.

If I drag it out, good for her, if not, well shit on it.

Another good point. I figure my wife is about 100 orgasms ahead of me by now, including the ones I wasn't there to witness. So if I do a little catching up...well, I'm sure she understands.


Me-45
WW-42
DDay 2/17/13, 10 month PA/EA
Final NC late Feb. '13
M - 18 years, together 19+
4 children

Reconciled


Posts: 1025 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
Betrayed444
♂ Member
Member # 38389
Default  Posted: 12:10 AM, August 3rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No kidding Later, as B444 said, like picking low hanging fruit. For the easiest pickings, find one in her 40s. If the internet is to be believed, there are men who specifically target married woman. It makes sense if you think about it - sex without commitment. And the expense. You can't really buy the married woman anything real expensive that will stand out. You can't move in with her, so no bills. Perfect. If you have no soul, that is.

ETA: Speaking of B444, where has our brother been hiding lately? Hope he's doing ok.

Someone call in a fire mission?
I've been down range for awhile. Deep behind enemy lines all camo'd up and negotiating the minefield that is known As WW.

Yes. A housewife is one of the easiest mammals to mount. They graze the same field everyday and will coyly approach the stranger holding out an apple from the other side of the fence.
They don't see or turn a blind eye to the fact that the roof over her head, the food in the pantry, the vehicles in the garage, cable, phone, oil changes, wardrobe, hair stylists, nail salons, and any other daily maintenance is provided by yourself. Ok they may also contribute but it's a team effort. The children. Family responsibilities, fuck even day to day lives are taken for granted.
No some guy uses some bullshit line to get her to talk. He'll nod, listen, show "genuine" interest. Laugh at her jokes. Provide feedback. Whatever. He's on a bombing mission. He has a target. He knows his game. Positive mirroring. Next thing you know shell be sucking his dick in the back seat of his POS vehicle.
WW knows its wrong. She wasn't taken over by aliens. There is no fog. She just says fuck it. So what. I want it. Fuck you, fuck the kids, fuck the house, fuck it all. I won't get caught and if I do so what. Her game plan is all figured out. Her excuses, her gas lighting. Her rug sweeping.
Make no mistake. You did not catch her by surprise. She expected it from day one. Whether it takes days, weeks, or years it will end. Why not ride it for all it's worth. And in many cases its not the first time. It's the first time you caught it. Old Italian proverb says the one affair you catch her in is the one where she got sloppy.
Ever notice how most everything you know about the A were the things you found out. Things volunteered were just kibbles to make you think she was confessing.
Married women are easy. They really are low maintenance. Most OM's they pick are sleazy because its a crime of opportunity. They can't really put it out there that they are available so they tend to hook men with low moral standards and a lot of people with low standards are really unsuccessful at life.
I have made a lot of progress with my WW. I called my attorney, made an appointment and even had plans with another woman. It was over.
She begged me to cancel both. I did.
She has talked, she completed rehab. She's made big efforts.
Of course she did. I make great money, I'm in really good shape, I love my kids. I know if it were over she is attractive enough to find some slob to take care of her but he will never be me and I have a feeling the menz here are the same. We care and we fight. We are strong, compassionate, and loyal which plays a big part of why we have chosen to stay.
Another reason I am staying for the moment is that time is on my side. I can't really afford to strike out with my kids on our own but my salary is increasing all the time. If I had to though I could manage.
As TC said prior
I am not *wired* to accept any of this. This is why we struggle with this situation daily. I am not * wired* to accept lack of remorse because I myself couldn't do it to her.
She said the other day that she was pissed at OM. She is going through an angry rejection phase. Why did she have to get in sooooo much trouble and nothing happened to him. He couldn't get away fast enough.
I was pissed the other day. POS resurfaced after 9 months on Facebook. He went underground since Dday. I was going to post his profile here or send some grunts to harass him on a military site but I'm over it. Seriously. He took advantage of her throwing herself out there.

I make no mistakes. WW wasn't a victim. She pursued. She said she offered the first kiss. OM's are smart like that. It excuses them from culpability. They have time to let them make the first move.
Stay strong.

[This message edited by Betrayed444 at 12:13 AM, August 3rd (Saturday)]


Posts: 494 | Registered: Feb 2013
Stillkicking
♂ Member
Member # 38246
Default  Posted: 12:37 AM, August 3rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

B444, good to see you bud.

Yes. A housewife is one of the easiest mammals to mount. They graze the same field everyday and will coyly approach the stranger holding out an apple from the other side of the fence.

Kinda makes a guy wonder if they are like fish and learn over time that bait is just that, bait. I highly fucking doubt it, I wouldn't insult a trout by putting it in the same class...

Ever notice how most everything you know about the A were the things you found out. Things volunteered were just kibbles to make you think she was confessing.

Never even registered, but wow, true in my case.

We care and we fight. We are strong, compassionate, and loyal which plays a big part of why we have chosen to stay.

^^^^^THIS^^^^^

B444... Perfect return post brother.


Anyways my reason for posting...

Not sure why this popped into my head nowhere even close to my normal scope of music... Whatever I bought it and now I am listening to it and thought I'd share....

Blue Rodeo. Hasn't hit me yet

You say that you're leaving
Well that comes as no surprise
Still I kinda like this feeling
Of being left behind

Yea this ain't nothing new to me
Well it's just like going home
It's kinda like those sunsets
That leave you feeling so stoned

Hey hey I guess it hasn't hit me yet
I fell through this crack
And I kinda lost my head
I stand transfixed
Before this street light
Watching the snow fall
On this cold December night

I never thought this could happen
But somehow the feeling is gone
You got sick of the patterns
And I got lost in this song
Hey hey I guess it hasn't hit me yet
I fell through this crack
And I kinda lost my head
I stand transfixed
Before this streetlight
Watching the snow fall
On this cold December night

Hey hey I guess it hasn't hit me yet
I fell through this crack
And I kinda lost my head
I stand transfixed
Before this streetlight
Watching the snow fall
On this cold December night

And out in the middle of Lake Ontario
The same snow is falling
On the deep silent water
The great dark wonder
Into the waves of my heart
Into the waves of my heart
Of my heart...

Funny thing is that I never ever listen to the radio and for some reason i switched to the radio on my way home on the day of confrontation and this song was the next song that played and it ended as I pulled in the driveway. It's weird (almost ackweird) that I am just remembering that now. Maybe my brain is just finally making its way through (quote b444 if I can) "this mine field.

I have a feelin the next part of this journey is gonna fucking suck. Praying for strength.

ETA:
Wouldn't let me quote it but;
"Another good point. I figure my wife is about 100 orgasms ahead of me by now, including the ones I wasn't there to witness. So if I do a little catching up...well, I'm sure she understands."

Well played sir, well played.

[This message edited by Stillkicking at 12:43 AM, August 3rd (Saturday)]


You'll never learn to fly
until your standing at the cliff

I reserve my right to feel uncomfortable reserve my right to be afraid.
I make mistakes and I am humbled every step of the way.


Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Canada
Topic Posts: 1000
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13 · 14 · 15 · 16 · 17 · 18 · 19 · 20 · 21 · 22 · 23 · 24 · 25 · 26 · 27 · 28 · 29 · 30 · 31 · 32 · 33 · 34 · 35 · 36 · 37 · 38 · 39 · 40 · 41 · 42 · 43 · 44 · 45 · 46 · 47 · 48 · 49 · 50

Return to Forum: I Can Relate This Topic is Full
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.