Topic: When someone is interested in you & their name is the same as ex
Member # 29183
| Posted: 7:53 PM, July 24th (Wednesday), 2013|
It would be weird at first, but I have a good friend with the same name as WXH and for some reason, it sounds different when I'm referring to or thinking of him.
I wouldn't write him off at first. At least get to know him a little.
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011
Posts: 2498 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: A better place
Member # 33226
| Posted: 7:58 PM, July 24th (Wednesday), 2013|
If I accidentally call an SO by the "name" in my head for WXH, I will be apologizing for calling him an asshole motherfucker. Some people change THEIR name when they divorce; I changed his. OMG, caregiver - that is AWESOME.
You can call me NIK
There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox
Posts: 22650 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 30346
| Posted: 8:49 PM, July 24th (Wednesday), 2013|
t/j when my BFF and I were texting about ex a long time ago...her phone autocorrected "That Fuck" to "That Duck".
We now just roll with it.
Has the ducker quacked today?
What the Duck?
If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck...
Also enables me to talk in code about the ducker in front of the kids.
me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, separated 3 years, together 17
Alis volat propriis "She flies with her own wings"
Posts: 3612 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Virginia
Member # 36060
| Posted: 9:35 PM, July 24th (Wednesday), 2013|
I couldn't do it. At least not yet. Waffle has a pretty common name, first and last. There's more than one column of them in the old school phone book. I rarely used his name, but the mental association would be too strong.
It did turn out that waffle has the same name (first and last) as MOW's first H.
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
2 DS and DD all w/autism
Posts: 707 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
Member # 35229
| Posted: 10:13 PM, July 24th (Wednesday), 2013|
If I accidentally call an SO by the "name" in my head for WXH, I will be apologizing for calling him an asshole motherfucker. Some people change THEIR name when they divorce; I changed his.
@ CG, he will always be Stretch and Skew to me. That story is quickly spreading throughout Sydney. This is how urban legends begin...
Sending all of the love and strength I can muster to Phoenix1 and her family.
"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."
Posts: 4554 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 27186
| Posted: 1:13 AM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013|
My ex and son have the same name. It's sort of common and doesn't bother me at all. SO name is very similar, and I've feared calling him by the ex's name since I talk with both frequently. Luckily, SO knows I'm bad with that, and I have even accidentally mixed the dog or cat's name in while hollering for a human, lol! Thankfully I have never erred their names!
BS-34; WXH-32; DS8; DS3; OC3
DDay: SEPT 2008
Divorced: JUNE 2010
Posts: 318 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Indy
Member # 21791
| Posted: 8:43 AM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013|
My current SO and my XH have the same name. I think it is a fairly common name in the 50 year old crowd. Doesn't bother me at all, in fact has been helpful at certain moments!
Married 21 years
Two sons 21 and 23 in college
Posts: 1434 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Northern Michigan
Member # 30803
| Posted: 10:30 AM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013|
My XH's name isn't a common one.
If someone was interested in me that had the same name...I'd consider it Divine Intervention and run as fast as I could in the opposite direction.
No way, Jose.
Me ($39.95 plus S & H)
Enjoying this chapter in my life.
Learning that being alone does not mean being lonely.
Discovering that where I've been is not as important as where I'm going.
Posts: 355 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Right Here, Canada
|Sad in AZ|
Member # 24239
| Posted: 10:36 AM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013|
I know so many of you deal with asshole Xs, especially those with young children. I will have to qualify my response by saying it probably does not apply in your situtations, but for someone older like me or perhaps childless, if you were bothered by a name, I would say that you were in no way healed from your experience and not ready for dating.
I never liked the X's name but I'm pretty sure if I met an awesome guy with that name, I could handle it.
I promise to surround myself with amazing souls and love them fiercely.
Posts: 19175 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Member # 22860
| Posted: 1:38 AM, July 26th (Friday), 2013|
tj: for cmego about the duck.
my friend texted me that my ex was an asswhole.... then straight away sent me another saying that she knew it was spelt wrong but it was OK cause he was a whole ass
yup she called that one right
Me = FBS
Him = gone
things that happen in my life do not define who I am. I get to choose to be the best I can be, for me. cause I'm worth it.
Posts: 286 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: my happy place (most of the time)
Member # 36134
| Posted: 9:40 PM, July 26th (Friday), 2013|
Before I met xh , the 4 or 5 guys i dated all had x's first name. I also dated them in alphabetical order.
I think I need to go a bit further in the alphabet.
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
Posts: 4023 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
|Helen of Troy|
Member # 26419
| Posted: 10:22 AM, July 28th (Sunday), 2013|
Same name and birthdate would bother me. It would be really hard to get over either of those.
Posts: 4610 | Registered: Dec 2009
Member # 10552
| Posted: 10:32 AM, July 28th (Sunday), 2013|
ex-asshat's name isn't odd but it's an "older" name and you don't see it much. (It's also XFIL's name and the oldest banana's name.)
That said, put me in the "no way" camp. Maybe it's not fair to all the other nice ones out there but I associate way too much heartache with that name. I couldn't go there.
A friend of mine has an H with the same name as her XH. We've always referred to them as ET ("Evil Todd") and NT ("New Todd").
[This message edited by wildbananas at 10:34 AM, July 28th (Sunday)]
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
Posts: 15279 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Just a Cali girl
Member # 26071
| Posted: 3:41 PM, July 28th (Sunday), 2013|
My best friend married a guy with the same name as her Dad. THAT would bug me.
D-Day: 6/5/09, drunken ONS on business trip, confessed immediately, transparent, remorseful but emotionally clueless
M 11 years, 3 kids
4/12 Tried to R for 3 years, have decided to D
12/31/12 D final
Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: PacNW
Member # 5372
| Posted: 9:00 PM, July 28th (Sunday), 2013|
One of my best friends married two Mikes. (She divorced them both.) She starts her stories "When i was married to Mike #2..."
My ex is also Mike/Michael. Through the seventies and eighties, the name was #1 in popularity. I have managed to avoid dating another one, somehow. I have dated the most Marks since my divorce, I guess, though not all of them turned into relationships.
I guess I wouldn't rule out dating another Mike if i met one who were any good, but it hasn't happened yet, so that's good, i guess.
Filed for divorce 9/2006
We accept the love we think we deserve. "The Perks of Being a Wallflower."
Posts: 12326 | Registered: Sep 2004 | From: Margaritaville
|Topic Posts: 35|