Devastated, listen very carefully to the REAL story I am about to tell you. I know ALL the players in this story as they are all my family members.
A relative of mine, we'll call him Guy, is married to a woman who is straying, we'll call her Broad. So Guy and Broad were married for about 15 years or so. They have a few kids, own a home, live the American dream. I also have another relative, we'll call him Scum. He's freshly off of a divorce at the time this situation happened, but he's been Scum since he was a youth.
So Guy and Broad had tried to help Scum through his divorce pains. Guy did more of the communicating than Broad did though. Guy was blind sided one day when Broad moved out for some "space". Just a few days later, Guy finds out Broad had been dating Scum for some time at that point... probably before Scum even left his wife.
Guy listens to his preacher who tells him to show his wife love and "win her back". Guy listens to his wife talk about her life, her troubles, her problems with bills. Guy bends over and takes it. Guy gives Broad money for her bills to help her out and show her his love, he brings her dinner when she claims to have no money for food, he lets her visit the kids whenever she feels the urge to, etc. etc. etc. He takes her to nice places for dates, and posts loving messages for her on his Facebook page... even though she has unfriended him by this point.
Several months later, Broad moves back home because she simply couldn't afford her place alone anymore, and she didn't want to move in with Scum. Why? Well, because she was also sleeping with ANOTHER guy at the same time. Having Scum living with her would ruin her affair that she was having on HIM at the time. But living with Guy, she knew she would still be able to come and go as she pleased and treat him like dirt because he has been accepting of that for many months already at this time. So she moves back home, but lives in another room and refuses to share a room with Guy. Guy carries on, letting his wife treat him like dirt and loving her the whole time. She continues to leave the house for EVERY weekend, spending each weekend with another new guy (we're up to 3 OM now at this point in case you lost track).
Several months go by like this. The kids are confused, angry, and sad. Broad decides that the kids are cramping her style, so she moves out again. She cleans the house out while Guy is out of town for a short while. She has moved in with yet ANOTHER guy (4th). She continues to string Guy along so she can get money from him whenever she wants it, and she can also count on him to do whatever she wants because she knows he still holds out hope that they'll be together again someday.
It's been over 2 years now, she's been having sex with several other guys (never Guy though), taking Guy's money, using and abusing him for whatever her selfish desires are, and tossing him aside when her boyfriends call. She never responds with love to him, never says she loves him at all, never even treats him nicely. She uses him to take her places that the other guys can't because their wives will find out. And yet he still holds out hope.
Honestly, it's incredibly sad and pathetic to see him accept this treatment from her. He doesn't look like a strong guy waiting for his wife to come back, he looks like a weakling who can't fathom a life without the woman who is hell bent on destroying him. His preacher has even finally told him that she won't come back, but he still shouldn't initiate the divorce.
This is a cautionary tale.... you can NOT love a cheater back. You simply can't. The only way the WW will come out of this fog she's in is if you take a firm stand, even at the risk of losing her, and mean it. I know it seems very scary, but it's the only way to get rid of this other guy.