My DD was almost 4 years ago. D was final 4 months ago. Have gone thru most of the stages that I've read about here, not alot of the anger, tho.
Thru out this whole nightmare, still feel 'love' for XH. Not so much romantic love, more of an agape sort. (I'm outing my inner hippie here. )
The more time that passes, the more I finally GET that I'm better off w/o XH. This morning, I'm enjoying the sunrise and it occurs to me that I'm LUCKY to be free of him. Even though I'm scared and confused, it still beats where I was pre-DD.
I held out hope for M & XH for over 3 years. I wasted that time on a man who is damaged beyond fixing himself, yet I still loved. I cried over all of it, even last week still.
I guess the point of all of this is to encourage those of you who are earlier in the process. It really, really does get better.
I never thought I'd actually feel relief that I'm D'd from him.