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New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: He's just not that into you....or is he?
timeforchange
♀ Member
Member # 27454
Default  Posted: 12:20 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great attitude Shelly.

At the end of the day none of us really know what he is thinking / doing.

But we do know you are doing the right thing

Just keep thinking "he needs to prove himself worthy of me".

You have come a long way in the last couple of years


Me = BS aged 43
2 boys, 13 and 9
DDay 1/19/10
Confronted him 2/16/10
Finally Divorced 8/29/12

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”


Posts: 726 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Expats in Europe
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 5:26 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you timeforchange....

It has taken a lot of work and IC but I'm glad I'm in a much better place with myself! And, that's the most important thing!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
CrappyLife
♂ Member
Member # 37630
Default  Posted: 6:21 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh.. geez.. Caught up on this thread just now.. that reply text of his is plain rude..

Yea.. crickets from you is the best.. and IMHO, he has some explaining to do for that text of his the next time you meet, if that happens..


BBF-turned-BH: 28 (Me)
WGF-turned-WW: 28 (EmotionalFool)
POS1: a 'friend'? WW believed it was my 'best friend'!
POS2: her senior at work!
Together - 6 years
Married - 1.5 years
D-Day- 15/10/12

Don't know where we are headed..


Posts: 276 | Registered: Nov 2012
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 7:38 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah.....I definitely took it as a ...."Do NOT text me again" type of text while he is out of town....which I found a little odd. I figured if he was going to be locked up in a hotel room all week (which is his story) working that a thoughtful text here or there would break up the monotony.... but.....apparently not...


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
trumanshow
♀ Member
Member # 25624
Default  Posted: 8:32 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Main reason I gave up on OLD was because they were all poofers. No matter how interested they were before/during-even after meeting IRL they would disappear. Didn't matter what I did or didn't do, what I did or didn't say. Maybe this isn't the case here but it seems suspicious

I came to the conclusion that the majority were players/wanna be players/didn't know what the hell they wanted/were conflict avoiders

Many times a few weeks later they would come sniffing around-like I was supposed to be sitting there waiting for them to circle back like Haley's comet. Yeah-right

I agree that if they're really interested there's little doubt that you'll know it


Your ex wanting to be friends is like asking a kidnapper to stay in touch when they let you go.

The type of fierce loyalty that I possess made me incapable of comprehending the level of disloyalty that he possessed


Posts: 1744 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Charlotte, NC
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 8:58 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah....I had a really bad situation with a Poofer when I was separated. HENCE the reason you should NOT date when you aren't divorced yet! HENCE the reason you should not date for a while AFTER you divorce too! Lesson learned the HARD way!!!

Live and learn...and then LUVS yourself!

Yeah....he was mr. wonderful....I fell hard... he introduced me to his family....friends....we got physical pretty fast...after just a month or so....and after another month....POOF! Without a warning or anything! And, since he lives an hour away....it was way too easy for him to do! I was devastated!

Then...come to find out...it was because he had been seeing another girl the whole time he was seeing me!! I was the runner-up apparently....

Oh well.... yeah...OLD can be difficult ...which is why I am making sure not to let myself get emotionally invested too soon or invested AT ALL too soon and am learning that having a thicker skin is a necessity... and knowing that the pond is full of a lot of warted bullfrogs helps too...


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
OnceInALifetime
♂ Member
Member # 26023
Default  Posted: 11:43 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have terrible radar for these sorts of things, but I wonder if Mr. Amazing has another woman in his life.

You had a great date, and he talks about wanting to get together again. Then he takes down his profile, cancels a date for a pretty lame reason (IMHO), and basically tells you to bugger off when you text him.

I wonder if he might have found someone else and just wants you to "go away" because he's another chicken shit poofer, OR if he was never single to begin with ( ). Maybe his ass got busted,

I'm not normally a conspiracy theorist, but something about his actions seems secretive and strange.


BH, now divorced

Posts: 3012 | Registered: Oct 2009
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 11:57 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah I agree OnceInALifetime.....

Because we DID have an awesome date! And, when he talked to me last Friday.... he was being all sweet...telling me it was nice to hear my voice and then scheduled the 2nd date....all sounded on track....

HOWEVER....and this is probably me reading too much into it again....he had texted me Sunday telling me he could pick me up at my house or meet me downtown....and that's when I told him that my sitter would be at MY house with my daughter (I don't know why I said that...I think more because I'm not really at the place yet for him to meet my child yet....) but that he could pick me up or I could meet him (But I planned on just meeting him outside my house if he picked me up).... and then a couple of hours later...he tells me about his "snag" and how he had to cancel.... wonder if he thought he was going to "try" something but then found that out and decided he didn't want to go out at all? But, again....that's me overanalyzing again....probably had nothing to do with that!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
OnceInALifetime
♂ Member
Member # 26023
Default  Posted: 12:12 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah, I doubt he backed away because he saw he wouldn't get lucky that day. Even the worst of players would be patient enough to wait at least 3 dates, I'd think.

It's a curious thing, but my getting morbidly interested in it does no good for you. You're right to just forget about him. Truth is there's no knowing what his motivations were, but you can know that he's not worth your attention.

[This message edited by OnceInALifetime at 12:36 PM, July 11th (Thursday)]


BH, now divorced

Posts: 3012 | Registered: Oct 2009
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 12:26 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree.....knowing my luck he has a "lady in waiting" in Atlanta (which is where he is now), New York...(where he will be in a couple of weeks and he said he will get to "play" some there), and Sweden, which he will be in about a month....

No thanks. Don't have the desire for game-players or even playing the guessing game. I want a man that I never have to question his intentions... I just know!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
trumanshow
♀ Member
Member # 25624
Default  Posted: 6:26 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I also noticed on OLD-the ones who said "no game playing" were the ones who played the most games themselves!


Your ex wanting to be friends is like asking a kidnapper to stay in touch when they let you go.

The type of fierce loyalty that I possess made me incapable of comprehending the level of disloyalty that he possessed


Posts: 1744 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Charlotte, NC
peridot
♀ Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 6:37 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Next


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4729 | Registered: Feb 2008
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah...and on his profile he said that he had a busy life but "was willing to make time for that special someone...." Hmmm..... Guess I"m not it!! Maybe that's why he took his profile down....changed his mind about that!!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
Topic Posts: 53
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