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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: How did you handle the breakup of WS and AP?
♀ Member
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 10:31 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When XWH#1's AP dumped him after I filed for D, I was happy. She was only 18 and not the brightest crayon in the box. She was smart enough to know that his money source (me) was out of the picture and he couldn't dish out money to her anymore. He has since had numerous low life GF's. I don't even care at all anymore and haven't in years. He will never find a better woman than I was and he threw me and his family away for nothing, so he can now only get low lives to give him the time of day. I smile everytime someone tells me of his latest GF and then their breakup.

M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
♂ Member
Member # 35901
Default  Posted: 11:51 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was happy in a sadistic sort of way, but mostly annoyed that true love only lasted two months. Also was annoyed because it helped make life for the kids more unstable.

Her current boyfriend is a decent guy.

Posts: 205 | Registered: Jun 2012
♀ Member
Member # 30803
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Really well, actually.

A long time ago, I figured when their relationship failed (because let's face it, it was doomed from the start), I'd have a party, shout it from the rooftops and/or dance in the streets. I did none of these things. Truthfully, I couldn't bring myself to do any of it because I just didn't care.

Detachment really is a beautiful thing, folks.

Me ($39.95 plus S & H)
DS1(17), DS2(15)

Enjoying this chapter in my life.
Learning that being alone does not mean being lonely.
Discovering that where I've been is not as important as where I'm going.

Posts: 355 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Right Here, Canada
♀ Member
Member # 1330
Default  Posted: 1:28 PM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You mean before or after I broke into a spontaneous chorus of "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead?"


FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 25 and 22. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."

Posts: 29678 | Registered: Apr 2003 | From: Massachusetts
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 4:36 PM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It happened 6 months after our D was final. He tried to come back to me, but I was so DONE by then.

He said she wanted it to be like they were dating all the time and he just couldn't keep that up. DUH! When the illicit nature of their relationship was brought into the light of day without the wife (me) around, it fell apart. I wasn't happy or sad - just thinking to myself - "I told you so."

The positive is that I never had to deal with her at family functions or anything like that. He has had other GFs and even another wife since then, but they make no difference to me at all. As long as they are good to my kids and grandkids, I could care less.


[This message edited by Newlease at 4:36 PM, July 10th (Wednesday)]

Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7751 | Registered: Aug 2005
♀ Member
Member # 8795
Default  Posted: 6:44 PM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine told me, "now I understand how you felt." In other words, she was cheating, I guess.

My response was, "no, you have absolutely no idea. We are married - it's completely different."

And I then told him I didn't want to hear anything about any of it. We weren't friends, and I had no urge to hear anything about any of it - the only reason I was talking with him at all was to get a settlement agreement signed and in place.

It didn't matter at all to me (and I'm glad, too, since I was told later that they broke up and got back together at least once every couple of weeks, with her kicking him out and him living with his parents a few days each time.)

Too much drama. All I wanted was to have all of the mess out of my life.

Posts: 2409 | Registered: Nov 2005 | From: Maryland
♀ Member
Member # 25838
Default  Posted: 8:05 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Update: Apparently according to DD, Miss Chickadee Mistress is not handling breaking up so easily. She was constantly sobbing and texting WH...who knows her voodoo might work and get him back...
Is it normal that I don't believe their fully done with each other?

Posts: 477 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: New York
♀ Member
Member # 18222
Default  Posted: 8:12 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The first 3 times they broke up I was really happy.

The 4th time, I was not. He had been bringing her to the kids soccer games and stuff. They were talking marriage. I saw her daughters (11, 7,5 yrs old) about twice a week at that point, every week for several months. And, those little girls were desperate for attention. They would run to my (now) husband and I and cuddle and ask to come over. They'd wrestle with H. They'd ask me to braid their hair. They'd sit on our laps for the whole game. It was SO painfully obvious they just wanted love and attention. They asked their mom if they could just do like my boys, and live with us and visit them on the weekends. The breakup followed shortly after and she moved far away.

I don't think their mother was good for my boys, and in that respect, I was glad it was over. But, it's been about a year now, and I still worry about the girls. I didn't want those three out of my life.

Me-29,Two boys, 10 and 9

It will all be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end

Happily remarried to a wonderful man (Aussie). I think I found the right guy and the right finger this time.

Posts: 4491 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Indiana
♀ Member
Member # 36060
Default  Posted: 10:52 AM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cat, that's pretty funny. When waffle informed me of his first (alleged) break up with MOW, that was the first thing that came into my head too.

BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 739 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
♀ Member
Member # 38458
Default  Posted: 12:38 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OW left him damn near the same time I kicked Ex out. It happened so fast that I'm pretty confident that any sort of serious relationship between them only existed in Ex's head.

In my head a little Nelson voice said "Ha Ha!" but I really had no outward reaction other than anger. I was angry at all the crap he had just put me through and to see that he did that in pursuit of a delusional relationship disgusted me further. He wrecked our lives and what we built for our kids for something that wasn't even serious. It made me sick that I married someone so pathetic. Still does.

Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

Posts: 541 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
♂ Member
Member # 36726
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She and the AP just got engaged a few months ago. Less than one month after our D was final. I'm hoping she goes through with the marriage so she removes my name from hers since she doesn't deserve to carry my last name. Then they can break up for all I care. If he'll cheat with a married woman he certainly will cheat on a married woman. Whatever happens, not my problem any longer.

BH me 46
WW her 38
DDay 8-17-12
2 kids (12, 9)
Filed for D 9/14/12
Divorced 4/17/13
She - engaged 5/13 married 9/13

Posts: 583 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: PA
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 3:28 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She re-married her BXH (which one of that crazy love triangle was more stupid??)

I felt smug, because it was obviously a blow to Wxh's ego that she left him. Other than that, meh.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7781 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Topic Posts: 32
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