Your D-Day was over a year ago.
---Your WS still refuses to engage in ongoing therapy/counseling.
---She still appears to have some feelings for the OW. ---Does she still work with this OW? IF so - how is she handling the "work relationship"...is she being NO CONTACT at work?
---From your post: I assume the lack of an active sex life with WS is her choice, not your's: Is this correct?
SO, what do you anticipate changing in the next 3 months?
Do you truly believe your WS will become totally indifferent towards OW? That your WS will begins consistent, ongong therapy/counseling to address her affair issues?
Do you believe your WS will become romantically, sexually involved in your relationship again within this 3 months?
What are your real expectations - what changes to you really expect from your WS at the end of these 3 months?
Personally, I'd end any concentration on the OW - and concentrate on: EXACTLY what is your WS doing to FIX this mess she's made; and what your WS is doing to help you heal...and to show that she really, truly wants to reconcile this relationship.
From your posts - I'm not seeing much, if any efforts towards "reconciliation" from your WS.
I'm really sorry for the pain you're going through.
Me BS 59
Married 19 years
D-Day Nov 3, 2005
Child: Adopted Daughter 21 College Student now
I can understand being alone; but I hate being with someone and feeling lonely.