[This message edited by OldCow18 at 1:37 PM, June 28th (Friday)]
Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it.
It's hard to R and live apart. But if I had any doubts, he'd still be over the garage.
We'd been together 13 years, married 8, but I knew the damage was done- that I was done. We did not have children, so that probably made it a lot easier for me to make a decision so early on.
The common advice here is not to make any rash decisions, but honestly, when you know, you know.
The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small.
If you do ask him to leave make some ground rules - like he is not to have contact with OW in anyway shape or form.
Mr Lucky and I did separate for a week - he spent more time here than he had in the past 8 years I finally had to tell him he couldn't be coming over.
I played hardball. Really hard ball, long before I learned of 180 and SI. I refused to let him see our son (then 14) and refused to let him talk to him whenever he wanted. My goal was to let him see what a weekend dad really felt like. He wanted to take Lucky son to a sporting event, I refused telling him it wasn't "his weekend"
ONE week and he was begging to come home.
We also had rules; no dating, no seeing OW, no contact with OW... He didn't much like being all alone in a hotel room where Lucky daughter worked, bummer for him, right?
Really think what you want, having space to think is good but over thinking everything can make things worse too.