Our children are mostly grown, but they are still struggling with this, which he refuses to acknowledge. He thinks everyone should just go along as if this is all okay and they should just welcome her into the family because that's what he wants. Selfish much? But of course that's who he is.
I am still hurting because my emotions have not caught up with my brain which has finally realized that what I have been holding onto is a figment of my imagination. No one who cares about you repeatedly makes you feel that no matter what, you never quite measure up. No one who cares about you could go days not talking to you because they didn't approve of something you wore. I could go on, but you get the picture. Hopefully, through IC and the support of the people on this site, I will be able to continue to move forward. I have so many days when I just want to give in to depression and hurt, but I keep trying to keep going. I have been reading here for a month or so, and have found some of the things I've read very helpful in keeping me going. I decided to take the plunge and join the discussion. The hits just keep coming (that's how PAs operate) so I'm sure I'll be posting frequently in the near future. Thanks for listening.
Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise . . .
I'm so sorry for your pain. It sounds as if you have a good handle on your situation, but of course there is still so much hurt.
Do you have a IC?
I wish you the very best.
I am so glad you are in IC - I have found it really helpful to have that kind of support and help with insight. Have you checked out the healing library? (Link in the yellow box at the top left) there are some really helpful articles and suggested reading.
As for fitting into forums - just choose where you feel comfortable. Just found out if you want and there is also Divorce/Separation.
Welcome again - lots of hugs.
However, I'm noticing that as I have gradually been able to move into implementing the 180 (that is a hard one when you're first trying to get your bearings), I am learning to take the blows and they are beginning to have slightly less of an impact. That is today. Tomorrow may be different, but right now, I'm thankful for today. This is a great place which seems to be full of good, caring people. Maybe that's why betraying our spouse was not on our radar.
I think there is a word for that. And I think it is psychopath.
You are free now. Of course you are traumatized and in pain, but you are free.