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Newest Member: Gladiator5 (45339)

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User Topic: Packing...makes me wanna dick punch the ex
brokenfinger
♀ New Member
Member # 39586
Flame  Posted: 11:55 PM, June 25th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Started packing tonight.
So angry!
Not only has that mother fucker, messed up everything..now his kids have to move because he doesn't want to pay.

Packing up my life. Packing up because I really don't have choice, sucks even more. There is so much I can't control right now. Yet he's living the high life buying new things, and helping out his whore.

I'm so pissed he doesn't appear to have suffered at all. His parents enabled his sorry ass, and had bought everything he would need for a household for him.
They don't get it either..their son has a problem! But hey, I'm the asshole who gets the silent treatment. I hope karma butt rapes them with a cactus too.

Not only am I angry, I'm incredibly sad.
Sad I'm in this position, sad I couldn't keep my kids in the house. Sad I could not fix some one that was not my place to fix.
Every spice I packed tonight, was a reminder of a different time; I dare not use the word happier, as I was living in a plane filled with lies, that took a slow, fiery crash to the ground, no matter what I did. No emergency exit, no mayday, just a crash, and a huge fucking fireball.

My daughter could tell I was struggling tonight, she told me not to cry, or she would start crying. She understands why we have to move, but she is still sad. I wish that mother fucker was here to see that.

I have In this Moments' song "Burn" on repeat tonight.
Here are the lyrics, so true:

I feel this is the beginning
The beginning through the end
There’s nothing left to fear now
So watch me close as once again you

Burn me alive
Set me on fire
And watch me die
Burn me alive
Watch me ressurect
Right before your eyes

There’s no reason to cry now
There’s nothing to forgive
This suffering’s my blessing
The death of sin is how I live
Burn me alive
Set me on fire
And watch me die
Burn me alive
Watch me ressurect
Right before your eyes
Set me on fire
And watch me burn
Set me on fire
And watch me

Burn me alive
Set me on fire
And watch me die
Burn me alive
Watch me ressurect
Right before your eyes

"Burn" of the album "blood" by In This Moment


There is no stronger message, then dirt in your face.

Posts: 49 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Canada
Jospehine85
♀ Member
Member # 35971
Default  Posted: 12:10 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((brokenfinger))) Just wanted you to know you've been heard.

We all understand your anger.


Me - BS 40s
WH - 50s
4 Kids
Dday May 2012

Posts: 895 | Registered: Jun 2012
numbandnauseous
♀ Member
Member # 34525
Default  Posted: 12:13 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry, broken. I hope that writing it out helped some. Know that you are heard and I am right there with you - just filed a few days ago and asshole is already the happiest he's ever been after a day of crying and saying he would do anything to save our M.

He is pouring salt on your wound by destroying your family and making you and your kids move bc he doesn't want to pay while he lives it up with his whore. I hate him for you.

Whore can have the heartless, soulless bastard!

P.S. Love the song lyrics and love your expression of anger. The plane description is powerful.


BS (me) - 41
WH - 48, EA with HS GF x 2
M: 10 years, T: 20
2 small children
DDay#1 - Christmas 2011 (OW#1)
Confronted - 4/6/12
DDay#2 - July 9, 2012 (OW#2)
He is an SA (Oct 2012)
Divorcing

Posts: 827 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the other side
brokenfinger
♀ New Member
Member # 39586
Default  Posted: 9:08 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks everyone....
I find that's big thing, I spent months trying to save this crash, and talking and talking and talking, like a parrot with tourettes. He just placated me, but never heard me.

I realize now I just want to be heard!! I want someone to understand. Being here, on these forums, as made me realize that I'm not the only one who has been through this...ans actually that the shitface isn't all the original with his bullshit.

I'm proud of myself, packed the liquor cabinet without drinking a drop lol I sure wanted to, but I didn't.


There is no stronger message, then dirt in your face.

Posts: 49 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Canada
Shockleader
♂ Member
Member # 36827
Default  Posted: 9:35 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I TOTALLY GET where you are coming from, and well knew the anger, and complete unfair B.S. feelings about being "kicked out" of my home.

Believe me, these wayward cheating POS turds all work from the same tired, hackneyed script; can't even be original or creative with the fuckery. Best wish I can give you is for the time when you pretty much feel 'meh', and what a feeling it is! Good luck!


D-Day spring 2012
Me BS 47
Xcheater 44
One DD 19
Married 23 years
Divorced 12/23/13 Fu*king A!

The cruel, the unkind, those without honor, feast on the tender heart...


Posts: 652 | Registered: Sep 2012
brokenfinger
♀ New Member
Member # 39586
Default  Posted: 10:08 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Shock,thanks, I soooo look forward to that feeling. I still don't even like looking at him when I drop my kids off.

I have a really special friend (my bff for 15 years) who knew I was having a moment last night, so he stopped by for a visit. I don't know what it is about him lol But he's always has a way to make me calm the fuck down lol There are only two people I know that can do that.

We didn't even talk about the move that much (he knows everything, I went to his house the night I walked in, and he wants nothing to do with my ex). Just the idle talk, I had stopped by his moms store looking for boxes that day, and she sent more with him last night (she's a super nice lady).

So today, I'm just trying to find my calmness I felt when he was here, calming me down.

Also, my sister comes for a visit today. I can't wait. She lives on the other side of province,and is really the only blood family I have. I have lots of friends that are like family, but nothing beats my sissy!

Here's hoping for a calmer, more zen like day, maybe I'll got for a run..or a nap...I do like me a good nap!


There is no stronger message, then dirt in your face.

Posts: 49 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Canada
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 12:01 PM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Brokenfinger - I admire you, and know that you and I would get along really well in the real world.
I am sorry you are having such a bad time, because this Asshole puts his needs first.

I hope you get a front row seat when the Karma bus comes for him. Stay in touch with that anger, it's much more productive than sorrow.

Remember, you have been given the gift of clarity, and a new fresh start. Build on that, and show him who lost, it won't be you!!!


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8707 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Topic Posts: 7

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