What a douche. I'll just start there. Ef him and his OW. Ef him and spending all our money. Ef him while I paid the bills. Ef him while I worked 12 hour days to to provide medical benefits for kids bc he couldn't! Ef him for sleeping in hung over. Ef him for not loving me. At. all. Ef him for loving himself more than our newborn child. Ef him and crashing our cars. Ef him and his daily lies. Ef him at being an asshole bc he was guilty of cheating. Ef him for robbing me of the 3 years that I can never get back. Ef him for being infatuated with slutty tramps over and over again. FUCK R! ahhhh, I feel a thousand times better just admitting that to myself. Someone helped me get here.
I defenitly don't belong in R. I saw everyone there trying to be strong and work it out. I wanted so bad to be there, too. But, it's not real. I don't want him. I'm over him. He already broke my heart, stepped on it and shattered it to a million pieces. I'm not ready to forgive just yet... I told myself give it a year to decide if REAL R or not. We're both working on IC/MC so we can say we gave it a shot. I'm almost there! I have 4 more months to go. I'm so excited. :)
He's doing everything right, but I just don't want him anymore. I've been doing 180, but it's backfiring, he wants me more. I just don't give a shit about him.