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Newest Member: DevastatedWH (43169)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: being more social
ProbableIceCream
♂ Member
Member # 37468
Default  Posted: 10:45 PM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So I do a lot better with quantified goals than vague goals sometimes, and especially goals I can break down into little pieces.

I've not been going out and getting socially acclimated a lot, so I set a goal to go out and do some social activity involving strangers at least once every 10 days (I can change this over time naturally). I use an online tracker that ensures I meet an average over time, which I've been using all year for some other goals with a lot of success.

I started with something really easy, a movie meetup. It went pretty well. I had a conversation with a couple interesting guys before the movie. I'll go to the one next week if my schedule allows.

The anticipation for these new things is often a little scary, but the event itself is pretty calm. Seems like there's always other new people anyway.


Me: born 1982.
DD: born 2006 (I have abt 80% custody).
My D-Day was April 2012. Divorced Jul 2013.

Posts: 502 | Registered: Nov 2012
FaithFool
♀ Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 8:34 AM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

There is nothing wrong with being anti-social for the first couple of years after this mess.

It's OK to cocoon if you feel like it. It's called healing.

It was nearly two years for me before I ventured out again with friends.

But I prefer movies alone. Don't have to share the popcorn.


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
Celebrating 60 years on Earth

Posts: 16621 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it's great that you're stretching yourself! I have been in hibernate mode as well, and have just started meeting up with friends again. I like the idea of the online tracker. Good luck with your goal!


You can call me NIK

There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox


Posts: 22581 | Registered: Aug 2011
tesla
♀ Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 5:39 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I make myself talk to a stranger at races I'm running in. Or I start chatting with the grocery check-out clerk. They are no pressure situations and I can cut out fast if I feel like it.

I'm glad you are getting out a bit and you have a way to kind of hold yourself accountable to your goal.


ish kabibble

Posts: 4184 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Topic Posts: 4

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