Sorry you're so down.
If you haven't talked to your WH about how you're feeling, then go ahead a do so. Rage at him if you feel it necessary.
Get those feelings out. They're like a poison eating away at your soul.
FWIW, I hit a MAJOR anger stage around 5-6 months, and many other people on here did as well. Its possible that's what headed your way. If so, hang on, it does get better, although it seems like it never will.Me: BS
One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. ~Steven Deitz